Chapters (82)
- PRACTICALDEMONKEEPING
- CHRISTOPHER MOORE
- CONTENTS
- Part 1
- SATURDAY NIGHT
- THE BREEZE
- Part 2
- SUNDAY
- PINE COVE
- TRAVIS
- ROBERT
- AUGUSTUS BRINE
- THE DJINN’S STORY
- ARRIVAL
- ROBERT
- THE HEAD OF THE SLUG
- 10
- AUGUSTUS BRINE
- 11
- EFFROM
- 12
- JENNIFER
- Part 3
- SUNDAY NIGHT
- 13
- NIGHTFALL
- 14
- DINNER
- 15
- RACHEL
- 16
- HOWARD
- 17
- BILLY
- 18
- RACHEL
- 19
- JENNY’S HOUSE
- 20
- EFFROM
- 21
- AUGUSTUS BRINE
- 22
- TRAVIS AND JENNY
- Part 4
- MONDAY
- 23
- RIVERA
- 24
- AUGUSTUS BRINE
- 25
- AMANDA
- 26
- TRAVIS’S STORY
- 27
- AUGUSTUS
- 28
- EFFROM
- 29
- RIVERA
- 30
- JENNY
- 31
- GOOD GUYS
- 32
- THE HEAD OF THE SLUG
- 33
- RIVERA
- 34
- U-PICK-EM
- 35
- BAD GUYS, GOOD GUYS
- 36
- JENNY, ROBERT, RIVERA, AMANDA, TRAVIS, HOWARD, AND THE SPIDER
- 37
- GOOD GUYS
- ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
- About the Author
- PRAISE FORChristopher Moore
- ALSO BYChristopher Moore
- Credits
- Copyright
Time had lost meaning for The Breeze. He floated down the tunnel, for a whole day, but to him it seemed only minutes. He was just riding the buzz. Everything was copacetic. As he approached the light, he could make out the figures of people waiting for him. That’s right: your family and friends welcome you to the next life. The Breeze prepared himself for a truly bitchin’ party on the astral plane.
Coming out of the tunnel, The Breeze was enveloped by an intense white light. It was warm and comforting. The people’s faces came into view and as The Breeze floated up to them, he realized that he owed every one of them money.
PREDATORS
While night fell on some like a curtain of foreboding, others were meeting the advent of darkness with excited anticipation. Creatures of the night were rising from their resting places and venturing forth to feed on their unsuspecting victims.
They were feeding machines, armed with tooth and claw, instinctively driven to seek out their prey, gifted with stealth and night vision, perfectly adapted to the hunt. When they stalked the streets of Pine Cove, no one’s garbage cans were safe.
When they awakened that evening, they found a curious machine in their den. The supernatural sentience they had experienced the night before had passed, and they retained no memory of having stolen the tape player. They might have been frightened by the noise, but the battery had long since run down. They would push the machine out of the den when they returned, but now there was a scent on the wind that drove them to the hunt with urgent hunger. Two blocks away, Mrs. Eddleman had discarded a particularly gamey tuna-fish salad, and their acute olfactory systems had picked up the scent even while they slept.
The raccoons bounded into the night like wolves on the fold.
JENNIFER
For Jenny, evening came as a mix of blessing and curses. The call from Travis had come at five, as promised, and she found herself elated at being wanted but also thrown into a quandary about what to wear, how to behave, and where to go. Travis had left it up to her. She was a local and knew the best places to go, he had said, and he was right. He had even asked her to drive.
As soon as she had hung up, she ran to the garage for the shop vac to clean out her car. While she cleaned, she ran possibilities through her mind. Should she pick the most expensive restaurant? No, that might scare him away. There was a romantic Italian place south of town, but what if he got the wrong idea? Pizza was too informal for a dinner date. Burgers were out of the question. She was a vegetarian. English food? Nowhy punish the guy?
She found herself resenting Travis for making her decide. Finally she opted for the Italian place.