“Have another drink, it will make you feel better.” She thinks for a moment about all of the rules you learn first as a girl: Don’t talk to strangers. Don’t go anywhere with someone you don’t know. Keep an eye on your drinks. Don’t dress like you’re asking for it. Don’t get too drunk. But she is so tired of rules. When she found out she was having a daughter, she worried that she would have to instill in her that same vigilance, and what was vigilance but a form of fear? Screw it, she thinks, and swallows half of the glass in a single gulp. She needs this, for the drink to do its loosening work. But still she can’t help it. She doubles over, sobs until she gags. He stands over her—she watches his shadow on the floor.

“You said the Sunset Motel?”

What is it she hears in his voice? Anger? Excitement? She nods. She doesn’t trust herself to speak, or else she’ll start to cry again.

“I’ll take you home.”

She’s failed. She’s not sure she can ask for money, but she’ll need to ask for at least $15 to cover her room. She tries to think of how to say it on the elevator ride down, but the booze has already gone to her head. She feels her stomach rise up into her throat when the elevator drops, and she tries to tally up her drinks—the math doesn’t add up. She feels too drunk for the number of drinks she’s had, even with the way she gulped the last one down. She chalks it up to the sobbing, and the way the sound of her daughter’s screams echoes in her mind.

By the time they are in the parking garage, her vision is fuzzy at the edges. She tries to tell him that something is wrong, but there is a drag on her words when she speaks. He helps her into the car but that is not the right word—help. Help is what she needs, something that feels impossible and very far away. Her words retreat. Her arms go heavy at her sides. Along the road the lit billboards hover over the marsh, ringed in a hazy purple glow. They pass underneath the neon sign for the Sunset Motel and into the darkness. He guides his car around the back of the motel. She wants to tell him that this is not where she needs to go but can only manage a groan.