I saw myself again, a young boy, my ear pressed to the heavy door, frightened and silent. I imagined Louise. It had been a full moon the night before, maybe just enough light came through the cracks of the board for Louise to witness the struggling face of Chief Spear. Louise must have called for help. She had banged on the door. She had clawed at the walls until her fingers bled, and no one came. And even when they did come, even when they did see what Louise was calling for, they shut her back up again in this dim room with death. She had been alone all night and all morning in that closed room. The smell. The smell of bad death in a sealed room. I left there with a tight knot in my throat, not for Ernestine Chief Spear who had died without comfort, but for Louise who had lived through Ernestine’s death. I felt for Louise that day. Some people just seem to draw trouble, and Louise is one of them.

Florence recovered quickly. I went to see her in the hospital several times hoping, I guess, to see Louise. I found Louise there once without her grandmother. Louise kept her face hidden behind a fashion magazine, and didn’t even look up when I cleared my throat and offered her a ride home. Summer glared through the big hospital windows. They’d put Florence’s leg in a shining silver cast that caught the light. I had to squint across that brilliant cast to catch a glimpse of Louise’s legs. I looked until my eyes watered.

It was June when they released Florence. I made it my duty to give the whole family a ride home, sure that I would be traveling with Louise. But Louise slipped from the room while Grandma Magpie was signing Florence’s discharge papers. I ended up riding with Grandma and Florence. My heart fluttered as we passed Louise on the highway. She lifted her hand, but when I stopped the car to offer her a ride, she pushed herself away from the window. “I’m walking,” she said. I drove away reluctantly, watching the distance engulf her, the edge of the mountains fading, the shine of the river dulling in twilight, finally turning forward to stare at the open road stretching ahead of me for miles. I had hoped she would be afraid to walk the road after what had happened to her sister, but I would never be that lucky. It was clear she had other thoughts in her head.

Jules Bart and Louise THE COWBOY