BooksBarbecue
Back Pack Up the Moon Save as PDF
Chapters (46)
  1. Cover
  2. Praise for Kristan Higgins
  3. BERKLEY BOOKS BY KRISTAN HIGGINS
  4. Dedication
  5. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  6. 1
  7. 2
  8. 3
  9. 4
  10. 5
  11. 6
  12. 7
  13. 8
  14. 9
  15. 10
  16. 11
  17. 12
  18. 13
  19. 14
  20. 15
  21. 16
  22. 17
  23. 18
  24. 19
  25. 20
  26. 21
  27. 22
  28. 23
  29. 24
  30. 25
  31. 26
  32. 27
  33. 28
  34. 29
  35. 30
  36. 31
  37. 32
  38. 33
  39. 34
  40. 35
  41. 36
  42. EPILOGUE
  43. Readers Guide
  44. DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
  45. About the Author
  46. What’s next onyour reading list?

“Listen,” Lauren said eventually. “That whole lung collapse and intubation . . . I’m sorry you had to go through that. It must have been terrifying.”

“Yes, it was all about me, now that you mention it.”

She laughed and snuggled closer. “I know IPF is part of my life, but I still want to love it. My life, that is. Every day. Every hour. I want to have fun and do things and go places and be irresponsible and eat bad food—just once in a while, don’t panic—and . . . and all that stuff. I don’t want to be constantly checking myself to see if I’m okay.”

“‘Get busy living, or get busy dying,’” Josh intoned in his best impression of Morgan Freeman.

“Don’t you Shawshank me. But yes.”

He turned her to face him, and his eyes were shiny. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, Lauren. That hasn’t changed. That will never change.” His voice grew hoarse. “And, yes, I’m terrified of losing you.”

“I’m so sorry, honey.” Hot tears slipped out of her eyes. “I don’t want to die. I don’t want to be sick. I don’t want to leave you, but I’m here now, and that . . . that has to be enough.”

He looked at her for the longest time. A tear escaped, and she wiped it away. His eyes were so kind and gentle. That flame was still there, lighting up her heart. “Okay,” he finally whispered. “It will be enough. I’m still gonna keep trying to find a cure, though. Obviously.”

“Just not twenty hours a day, because I need you. Right here. With me, not attached to the computer.”

“I get it. Yes, ma’am.”

She kissed him, his lips so soft and wonderful. “I love you with all my heart.”

“I love you with all my liver.” He grinned, and she was abruptly laughing and crying. He knew. He understood. He always did.

“Okay.” She wiped her eyes. “So am I gonna get laid, or what?”

The answer was yes. He was gentle and slow and maybe a little too careful, but they were together, where they belonged.

And it was more than enough.

19

Joshua

Month six

August

JOSH HAD INTENDED to make things right with Sarah, but she’d taken a vacation just after his outburst. If she got his text, then email, she hadn’t answered.

He was tired of himself as he was. He hated the word widower, hated the oppressing sense of fatigue that started every day. The other day, his friend Keung in London had emailed him. Said he was thinking of Josh because—wait for it—his grandmother had died, and he was really grieving, man, it was so hard, such an empty space in his life, he wanted to reach out to Josh, who’d understand.