Lotte says, ‘For ages and ages she walked around with a toy dragon stuck up her jumper and said she was going to have a baby! She went to nursery with it. She cried every time the dragon fell out. She said when baby Cinders was born, she was going to grow up to be a human bean!’

‘Do you remember the time she had to have those injections at the hospital?’ Theo says. ‘When we came home, she got a syringe out of her pretend doctor’s kit and practised giving everyone a shot.’

‘Yeah, and when it was your turn, she banged it right into your heart.’

‘And made a bruise.’

‘But she said it would make your heart big and strong and beautiful!’

I have no idea what to say. I don’t know how Amy copes with this.

‘I miss Ruby-May,’ says Lotte. ‘When will she come back?’

‘Lotte, I’m really sorry, but she’s never coming back. That’s what happens when you die. You don’t come back. Ever.’

‘Yeah, but where did she go?’

Fuck, fuck! Why hasn’t anyone talked to them about this?

Theo closes the iPad and they both look expectantly at me. Neither of them went to the funeral, so maybe they haven’t – as my ex would say – had closure. Maddison’s from New York and she’s obsessed with Gyrotonics, green juice and emotional intelligence. Actually she’d get on really well with Joe. I must remember never to introduce them.

‘Tell you what,’ I say, and I explain the brilliant idea I’ve just had.

The gratifying thing about children is their enthusiasm. They think my idea is brilliant too. And after I’ve helped them achieve ‘closure’, everyone will realize what a damn fine uncle I am and we’ll all be one happy family again. Once we’ve assembled everything we need, we head down to the beach. I don’t tell Dad we’re going – he’s fallen asleep anyway – and there’s no sign of Chloe. I send her a text and she replies, saying she’s still up at the farmhouse taking photos, but she’ll be back soon with bread and cheese for lunch. Pictures of Carlo, I think. I assume Bethany’s in bed sulking, but as we near the sea we spot her. She’s sprinting up the road and jogging down. Over and over again. She’s wearing shorts, a sports bra and a cap. Her hair is in a ponytail and her arms and legs glisten with suntan oil and sweat. Even though it’s only mid-morning, the heat is intense. It makes me feel lethargic, and what Bee is doing looks punishing. I guess this is what it takes to be a star on regional telly.