Chapters (49)
She’s jealous. There’s no way anyone would mistake Chloe for her sister: she looks old enough to be the girl’s mother; her own skin is so white there’s a bluish sheen to her limbs. When she was a child she had blonde hair, but it darkened as she grew older and she used to dye it back to the original colour. It’s now in a hacked-off bob, with four inches of roots showing and a yellow dip-dye effect at the straggly ends. Her high cheekbones and pointed chin gave her a pixie look when she was younger, but now they only heighten the gauntness of her features.
‘Have you got the Wi-Fi code? I meant to ask that kid for it.’
Amy wants to tell Bethany to chill out. ‘How’s the new job going? What days does your programme go out?’
‘It’s a daily show,’ Bethany says, giving her an icy glare. She should know this already.
‘It must have been hard to take the time off?’
‘That would the understatement of the century.’
Amy bites her tongue. If Bethany did lose her job on The Show to Tiffany, she’s bound to be feeling insecure. On the other hand, Amy no longer thinks a career is important. She can barely summon up the enthusiasm for her own job, and she’s sure her boss only keeps her on because he’s too much of a wimp to sack a mother who’s lost her child, when the charity she works for specializes in helping dying children to receive hospice care.
‘Carlo gave the Wi-Fi code to someone. I need it too,’ says Chloe, seizing her iPad.
‘I’ll get it for you, love,’ Amy says.
Luca had pinned it up on the noticeboard, but she remains in the kitchen for a moment, gathering herself. Her family is grouped around the pool: Bethany, Matt, Chloe, Theo and Lotte; even though Nick hasn’t arrived yet, she knows he’ll be here soon. It makes her twin loss much more acute – the absence of her dad and her youngest daughter. And although part of her hates him, she misses him, and the children miss their grandfather. She doesn’t know how to talk about him to them, and she can’t bring herself to discuss her dad with Matt; she can tell her husband’s barely managing to suppress his rage.
She wipes her eyes. Right! Time to act like we’re on holiday. She sets her mouth in a rictus of a smile and goes back outside.