I leaned back in the chair. “Exactly what I knew would happen. And what she told me would happen from the beginning. We had a lot of sex. Had a lot of fun. She obviously didn’t get attached, a promise that she kept.” An uneasy sadness filled that newly open space in my chest. I’d done what I was supposed to do—gotten laid, didn’t stress about it. I’d still known the ending this whole time, so why was I so upset? “This morning, she seemed to feel bad about us not talking about, you know, ending things when she went to Texas. Because we weren’t on the same page. I made sure she knew I was fine with it.”

I knew from the tears in her eyes as I left there was something she wasn’t telling me. She’d projected that bubbly cheer my way, and I knew she was faking it. I just didn’t know what she was keeping to herself, which hurt more than all the rest.

Rowan muttered a curse under his breath, snagging my attention. There were two spots of color in his cheeks. “Now it’s time for me to admit that I fucked up.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I pushed you into this,” he said. “Pushed you to hook up with Tabitha when you told me you didn’t think it’d work out the way you wanted. I knew…” Rowan blew out a breath. “I knew from the moment you started talking to her again that she wasn’t just some old crush from when we were kids. Tabitha is—always was—different for you. I feel like I gave you the kind of advice you’d want for some one-night stand with a stranger. Not the woman you’re in love with.”

My eyes darted to the ground. “It’s not your fault. Not one bit. Once I kissed her, that night at the art museum, there was no other option for me. Falling in love with her was my mistake to make.”

The words ripped through my throat, but I felt better, saying them out loud.

Rowan was quiet for a while. So quiet I wondered if I’d pissed him off. But he was looking at something on his computer, lines creasing his forehead. “Dean.”

“Yeah?”

He cleared his throat. “You, uh…you know I love you, yeah?”

I clapped him on the arm. “Of course. I love you too.”

“You made the right call, quitting boxing when you did,” he said in a tentative voice. “But it’s been hard, seeing you kinda lost. Seeing you feel worthless when you’re not. I pushed you with Tabitha because all of a sudden you were happy again. Not happy like when you were pros. Happy like what we were telling Tabitha the other night, before we were athletes and we were only kids.”