I shook my head. “No, and thank God. Two hours after I left them I knew I’d made a mistake. But I knew Tabitha was leaving and the park wasn’t going to work out, so I don’t know. I thought it was my best option, going back to an identity that doesn’t fit the same anymore.” I glanced back over at the food boxes. “I’m not Dean the Machine, and I don’t want to be.”

“I know,” Rowan said. “You don’t think a ton of retired athletes would have contemplated taking that offer? It’s a tempting one. What I do now, the satisfaction’s all internal. There’s no flash. No crowds of cheering fans. It’s less of an adrenaline rush, for sure. Lately though? It’s hard to see the appeal of that old life.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You mean you don’t miss sitting in an ice bath after every game?”

His response was a wolfish grin. “About as much as you miss getting your teeth knocked out on a Saturday night.”

I snorted, tapping my fingers on the table. “How’s the pay here?”

“Terrible.”

“And the hours?”

“Long. Plus I’ve heard there’s another, possibly more attractive ex-athlete that already works here. Could make you jealous.”

I shook my head with a smile. “Something tells me your director is going to regret putting the two of us together.”

He waved that off. “No way. Something tells me that the two of us working together could bring some great programs to this neighborhood.”

I swallowed hard, overcome by his generosity. “I want this job, Rowan.”

He nodded. “Good. It’s all yours. And you’ve already got Eddie signed up.”

I released another tightly held breath. “Harry’s gonna have my head when I tell him the news. But also I’ve been wanting to fire him for years so maybe this call won’t be that bad after all.”

Rowan whistled low under his breath. “I let go of mine a couple years ago. Best decision I ever made.”

A space was shifting and opening around the center of my chest. “It sounds like that’ll be the next one I make.”

I glanced over at the note stuck on Rowan’s computer. It was impossible not to remember Tabitha that first night, telling me about her passion in life: I like to tell stories about wildflowers growing through sidewalks, basically. All the things that take up space, demanding attention and justice in the face of larger forces trying to make them silent or invisible.

“What really happened with Tabitha?” Rowan asked.