‘That’s true,’ she said, but somehow the sparkle had come off the whole thing now. Perhaps it was just this place, talking about it amidst buzzers and the life-or-death balance of the intensive care unit. What did Finn know or care about her life? What on earth was she doing sitting here anyway, when she should be back at the flat catching up on her sleep?

*

When she did get back home, she could no more sleep than she might have if she’d just woken up after a long and peaceful night’s rest. The conversation with Finn had somehow distracted her, as if it had obliquely knocked her off balance and now, as she looked about her little flat, everything seemed to have taken on an unfamiliar quality. Instead, she wandered about the flat picking things up and opening drawers randomly, as if checking that everything was exactly where she expected it to be. And of course, everything was exactly as it was meant to be. She’d already tidied the place, so it didn’t look like quite the dump it had after Eddie had scrambled his bags together in a hurry for the week at home.

It was, she realised, actually really nice to have the place to herself – clean, tidy and fresh thanks to the window she’d opened to watch the snowflakes fall into the street below. She’d closed it quickly, and she’d shivered and pulled out the old cardigan that had once belonged to Rachel. She hardly ever wore it these days. When she pulled it on, it felt as if she had Rachel right next to her. She stood for a long time, just watching the snow fall, lost in her thoughts. When she looked at her watch again, it was almost midnight. She needed to get to bed.

It was the first night since Eddie went back for the Christmas holidays that she didn’t stumble into the room and collapse beneath the duvet. Instead, she took her time, had a lovely long shower, put on rich moisturiser and her favourite pyjamas from the hot press in the kitchen. The only other thing that could make it perfect was a hot chocolate, so she padded out and popped some milk on to heat.

It was as she was pulling down the box of chocolate powder that some bills and correspondence that Eddie had been ignoring for the last few weeks in the busy run-up to Christmas fell to the floor at her feet. She shook her head, picking them up; he really needed to make it his new year’s resolution to at least open his bills, she thought. She decided to leave them standing against the tea caddy so there would be no missing them when he got back, then, something caught her eye. The first letter had a handwritten note scrawled on the back of it.