This was so iced. I was from a strong Aunare line—a line of generations of fighters—and still, I couldn’t do a damned thing for my neighbors. “I’m letting them die so I can stay hidden. How can I look myself in the mirror after this?” He’d pinned me pretty well, but if I’d fought him harder… If I’d actually used my Aunare strength and speed…

He settled down beside me, staring up at the ceiling like I was. “Over the years I’ve done a lot of things I’m not proud of. I’ve blurred the lines so that I could stay in the good graces of SpaceTech. So that maybe I could change things. So that one day I could find you and your mom alive. Hell, for a lot of reasons I guess. But there were times I could’ve stood up and saved someone but didn’t. I’ve always tried to look at the bigger picture. The times when I didn’t stand up against something that I knew was wrong? I’ll have to live with them.”

I stared at his profile as he talked. He was pretty, even his bad company haircut couldn’t hide his perfect nose, square jaw, and light blue eyes. A little scar on his right cheek only gave him a bit of character.

He caught me staring and smiled, but it wasn’t as happy as it was earlier. His eyes didn’t crinkle in the corners. “I’m telling you only because I don’t want you to feel guilty about not saving your neighbors. When you look in the mirror, you’ll hold your chin high because I was the one to stop you. This was my bad. You can put this on my shoulders.”

No. I couldn’t let him take the guilt for my inaction. “Why make me feel better when you were just trying to do what’s best for me? Why do you care so much about me? I still don’t get it.” There was a scream from upstairs, and my hand found his.

He squeezed my fingers tightly. “You know that saying about not being able to pick your relatives but picking your family?”

“Sure,” I said, focusing on him and his words as the noise upstairs descended into deathly quiet.

“Well, I picked my family because the one I was born into is deplorable. But I got away. I spent a lot of time on Sel’Ani as kind of an exchange student and—”

What? “I didn’t know there were programs like that.”

“It was kind of a one student thing. I don’t think it went quite how they were hoping.” He turned away from me and was quiet for a second. Lost in his memories.

I wanted to ask so many questions, but I bit my lip to stop them from pouring out.