Chapters (76)
- Title Page
- Copyright Notice
- Dedication
- PROLOGUE
- PART I
- ONE
- TWO
- THREE
- FOUR
- FIVE
- SIX
- SEVEN
- EIGHT
- NINE
- PART II
- TEN
- ELEVEN
- TWELVE
- THIRTEEN
- FOURTEEN
- FIFTEEN
- SIXTEEN
- SEVENTEEN
- EIGHTEEN
- NINETEEN
- PART III
- TWENTY
- TWENTY-ONE
- TWENTY-TWO
- TWENTY-THREE
- TWENTY-FOUR
- TWENTY-FIVE
- TWENTY-SIX
- INTERLUDE
- PART IV
- TWENTY-SEVEN
- TWENTY-EIGHT
- TWENTY-NINE
- THIRTY
- THIRTY-ONE
- THIRTY-TWO
- THIRTY-THREE
- THIRTY-FOUR
- INTERLUDE
- PART V
- THIRTY-FIVE
- THIRTY-SIX
- THIRTY-SEVEN
- THIRTY-EIGHT
- PART VI
- THIRTY-NINE
- FORTY
- FORTY-ONE
- FORTY-TWO
- FORTY-THREE
- FORTY-FOUR
- FORTY-FIVE
- INTERLUDE
- PART VII
- FORTY-SIX
- FORTY-SEVEN
- FORTY-EIGHT
- FORTY-NINE
- FIFTY
- FIFTY-ONE
- FIFTY-TWO
- PART VIII
- FIFTY-THREE
- FIFTY-FOUR
- FIFTY-FIVE
- FIFTY-SIX
- EPILOGUE
- AUTHOR’S NOTE
- ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
- ABOUT THE AUTHOR
- Newsletter Sign-up
“Limp-wristed fop, where is he?” Oughtibridge drove every inch of his significant body closer to Guy. His moustache was thick and wrapped all the way down and up to his ears again, giving the remarkable impression that his hair itself was trying to reach around and suffocate him.
“The Sheriff is unavailable,” Guy lied. “I will convey your displeasure if you like. My men can see to your taxes.”
“You’d best convey it well,” the lord snarled, but his lips pulled back into something that gave all other smiles a bad name. “You see to it that he gets these taxes, directly, you understand?”
“Of course.”
“Open it then,” he stepped back.
Guy was immediately suspicious, but there was no reason to find danger in a coinchest. Guy signaled two of his men from the edge of the tables to claim the thing, while Guy knelt down to unlock its clasp. He could smell something foul as his face moved closer, but did not expect what he found when its lid flipped open.
“What is this?” Guy asked, recoiling, though he knew the answer.
“Horseshit,” the Lord Oughtibridge announced proudly. The chest was full to the brim with it, a mix of dry and wet clumps smashed into each other, seeping from the corners. Guy realized some of it was on his fingers from the clasp itself. He flicked it off and a chill ripped through his spine.
“Horseshit, because that’s what these taxes are,” the lord continued. “If I’m going to pay something, I’m supposed to get something in return. I told the tax collectors he sent, but the Sheriff clearly hasn’t gotten the message. I can’t travel anywhere without being harassed by these damned thieves in the forest, and de Lacy refuses to do anything about it. Until he can secure his own goddamned roads, I’m not paying a single fucking shilling.”
Guy watched the man strut back to the Temperance Line and grab an empty bowl from beside the pot of porridge, startling Devon down to his nethers.
“And this is the topper,” Oughtibridge cackled. “This is how he’s spending it. Here. If he wants to take my taxes and give it to the people…” he scraped the bowl into the chest to scoop out a slop of the excrement, then marched back to the line. “… then eat up!”
The bells from St. Peter called out a deep slow call to mass, and on the third strike Lord Oughtibridge dropped the entire bowl, shit and all, into the porridge.
THIRTY
WILLIAM DE WENDENAL
NOTTINGHAM CASTLE
OVER THE COURSE OF a thousand years, William explained, erosion could carve a gullet through a smooth field and cut it in two. He had watched the same principles lay waste to Nottinghamshire in a mere three weeks.