You could fall down, a trapdoor, an old well.

Don’t go there.

Say any word

With the inflection of a spell.

This turns off your power.

You have no more wishes.

You’re in the just past, a figure of history.

It makes you significant.

You know how you die.

Can you smoke cigarettes?

Can you make choices.

You’re a beautiful woman

In a black-and-white photo, forever,

Answering a rotary phone.

New Theories on Boredom

Once as a kid, I was so bored at my parents’ office that I made a deck of cards.

My brother had a really boring snake who only moved when you dumped a bag of live crickets into its cage.

I wonder what would bore a tortoise.

How bored are dogs? Pretty bored, I think.

I’m kind of interested in people using two stars to mean “I got bored and didn’t finish it.”

I don’t trust books that aren’t a little boring.

It’s almost like there should be different words for “boring because simple” and “boring because complex.”

“Boring because complex” isn’t actually boring, it can just be mistaken for boring, the way a hangover can be mistaken for guilt.

You can call this banality versus tedium, or “good boring” versus “bad boring.” Kubrick movies are often great while also boring.

Whether something is boring or not has nothing to do with how good it is.

You could also call “boring because complex” interesting-boring (boring in an interesting way) or slow-interesting (interesting, but at a pace that sometimes resembles boredom).

All good poetry is slow-interesting.

I often wonder why having a beverage makes something boring more interesting. To put it another way, I love drinking while I’m bored.

I wonder why we don’t get bored in the shower.

Michel Siffre lived alone in a cave in Texas for six months and got so bored he contemplated suicide, making it look like an accident.

I heard on the radio that lazy people have higher IQs—because their minds are more active, they don’t get bored doing nothing.

I don’t think this is true.

Some people outside are having a boring conversation about dogs in general.

When it rains it’s boring.

When it rains it bores holes into your body. Turns out it was acid rain!

Being so bored you actually start crying must be a really transformative experience.

To me, sex is not art. Once it’s over it’s boring again.

We’re in the bargaining stage of civilization, and it’s boring.

Civilization got bored with itself.

Pretty cool how we’ve evolved to find peace boring!

You can only be bored almost to death.

“This is boring.” “No, it interrogates boringness!” “This is doggerel.” “No, it interrogates talent!”

What, poets can’t be bored by eclipses?

How boring not to have a crush on anyone.