‘Oh God, Principal Holmes. Is he, I mean…? I should call or go round there or something tomorrow. I doubt he’s had time to make friends yet. That poor man.’

‘He was going with… with… Olivia.’

‘Oh, honey, I’m so sorry.’

Wren looked at her, the weight of guilt on his shoulders. He should have done something.

Wren heard Billy’s pickup pull up at the curb, its rumble as familiar as the flicking metallic noise the chain on his bike made. His mom patted his knee, then went to meet Billy at the door. He heard a hushed conversation and Billy swearing a bit louder than a whisper. He heard Billy’s heavy footsteps heading toward the lounge room. He came over and took the seat next to Wren, his mom standing in the doorway, looking on.

‘I’m so sorry, son.’ Billy took his hand in his. He had never been afraid to show affection to any of his family members; he loved them all. He pulled Wren to him in a crushing hug.

‘It’s my fault,’ Wren managed to get out.

‘No. It’s not. Olivia made this choice on her own. Loved ones often feel like this, but it actually has nothing to do with you.’

Not true.

‘I think I need to be alone. Thanks for the talk, Billy.’ Wren felt a little dizzy he stood up, handing his mug to Billy. He overbalanced a little when his mom caught him in a hug as he passed her. ‘Love you, Wren,’ she said simply, her face conveying all that her words didn’t. In that moment, he wanted to confess what had happened, but then the moment passed. This was something he would take to his grave. He went into his room, passing Ty’s room, the door half ajar, the lamp on. He loved Olivia, but his mom would have to break the news to Ty, he just couldn’t.

He grabbed his laptop and sat down on the bed. He typed: What does it feel like to drown?

He had a need to know. There were conflicting symptoms, but all agreed that sometimes you hallucinated. He wondered if Olivia did, and if so, what did she hallucinate? She would have breathed water into her lungs, then sunk to the bottom of the bathtub. He thought about the pain that her father was in right now. He had lost his entire family. One to a freak accident and the other to an unexplained suicide. Wren closed his laptop and put it back on the desk. He felt like going to the river, but it was well after dark and there’s no way his mom was letting him out of her sight tonight. Tomorrow.

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