Alexis blanched, processing the new intel. “I-I don’t know. I refused to look into it, rejected anything pertaining to you. I didn’t think I could handle that type of information.”

Gosh, after so much time, there was still so much pain. In me. In her. I could hear it in Alexis’ voice, see the truth in her eyes, the very lining of her expression. It mirrored mine.

I had no chance of controlling my impulses as I stepped forward and spoke my truth—the truth I had bottled up and let percolate over the past four and a half years.

“Well, listen, and listen good Alexis, ’cause this is all the information you will ever need from me. Losing you was the biggest regret of my entire life. I was a fool, a coward, a goddamn wretch. I made a mistake. A terrible, unforgivable mistake that ruined me, ruined us. I hurt the person I love the most over a fucking con, a gimmick that I wasn’t strong enough to fight on my own.”

Alexis was completely frozen as I slammed her with my sincerity. It was my first opportunity since everything had gone down to speak. And I wasn’t holding back, not anymore.

I took another step closer. “There is no child. There is no Everly. There is no other woman for me, ever.”

Tears lined my eyes as I poured everything I had into Alexis. Submitting to my selfish needs, I skimmed my fingers down her cheek. “I never got to apologise. Although it feels like I’ve been screaming the words for years. This may not mean anything to you now, but here it is anyway.” My hand pushed further, cupping the side of her face. So precious.

“I’m sorry, Alexis. I will forever be sorry. I know you deserve more than a measly apology, but that’s all I have to give. All my remorse and regret. I’m sorry, baby.”

Tears gathered in her eyes to match mine. Unable to watch them spill over, I removed my touch.

Looking at her was too much. The touch of her skin was too much. Those unsettling, chaotic emotions were all too fucking much.

Without waiting for a reply, I got in my car and screeched out of the parking lot, unable to survive any hate she may have harboured towards me despite knowing I wholeheartedly deserved it.

Chapter 18

ALEXIS

Weeks turned over as Austin and I adjusted to our new life after moving in with my parents. Dad had been discharged from hospital with ongoing outpatient rehab. I resigned from my previous job and found a replacement in the closest hospital. Austin was signed up to pre-school and had already made a best friend.