When I reach the last row, Devin scoots over a little so I can toss my bag on the floor and slide in next to them.

“Morning,” they say, all bright and cheery even though it’s not even eight yet.

I smile back at them, but it’s more of a grimace.

Devin laughs, passing me a Starbucks cup, and honestly, I’m not sure what I did to deserve them. Between the cold of the Colorado morning and the lack of sleep—which is mostly my fault—the coffee feels like life in my hands, gently breathing into me.

“You excited?” Devin asks.

And really, it’s a pretty pointless question since anyone can tell I’m not. It’s bad enough that I’ve never done a sleepaway camp before, but I also know it’s likely I’ll lose signal and Drew won’t be able to reach me if he needs me. Considering this is our first time apart as real boyfriends—or, well, as anything really—I feel terrible knowing I can’t guarantee a timely response.

Devin holds open a box of doughnuts, and I take one because I’ll die before I refuse free food. It’s sweet against my tongue, and I just let it sit in my mouth for a moment as my brain struggles to wake up.

“I hope it’s not too much trouble,” they say, “but I’ve been thinking about the pronoun thing again.”

I turn to them, hoping I look mostly like a human person by now. “Did you want to change them again?”

They shrug. “I don’t hate they/them, but it doesn’t really feel right, you know? Like he/him, I guess.”

“So what do you want to use now?”

Devin looks up at me like they’re worried I’m going to get mad before sighing and saying, “Does xe/xem sound okay?”

And really, I’ve never heard those sounds before in my life, but I nod anyway. It’s not my job to tell Devin what pronouns xe can or can’t use.

They load up the bus faster than expected, and within the next twenty minutes, we’re barreling down the street, headed for the middle of nowhere.

I pull out my phone to check for signal or a message from Drew. Looks like I still have the first but haven’t gotten the second yet.

Devin’s got a line of sugar on xyr lip from the doughnut, so I grab a napkin and half shove it in xyr face.

Xe laughs, pulling it out of my hand and wiping the sugar away. “Sorry.”

I roll my eyes. “You apologize too much.”

We sit in silence for a while. I don’t even realize I’ve knocked out until my phone vibrates, the movement shocking me awake, and I jerk away from where my head has fallen onto Devin’s shoulder.

“What the hell?” I say.