Which is bold of him to say since my sun aversion is largely his fault. My current “bedroom” is a closet, which I told Brian is child abuse, but it’s not really the space or even the lazy metaphor that bothers me. I basically end up oversleeping every morning since no sunlight filters in, which means I lose out on valuable Denver time and even more valuable social media time with all my old Florida friends.

And really, this week that I’ve spent in Denver is also the first week I’ve spent openly trans, and it’s stifling to be locked inside all day. I wanna let my hair down, or at least what’s left of it since I chopped most of it off for my transition.

We hit the smoky backyard and are immediately greeted by a loud as hell group of college students. Brian passes off the tray to some guy in a baseball cap, who opens the lid with an eyebrow raised. The crowd’s pretty white, so I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve never seen onigiri before, but Brian stayed up pretty late last night making them. He’s been on a cooking kick for the past month or so since he started dating a white girl who likes “exotic cuisines.” It’s all part of that straight-girl fixation on jocks who “embrace their feminine side” by cooking and taking care of animals, but definitely not by wearing dresses or makeup.

Maggie comes up and kisses Brian’s cheek. I’ve never seen her in person before, but she’s pretty in that tall, thin white girl way, with waist-length brown hair and acrylic nails.

Brian introduces me to the group, saying, “This is my brother, Noah.”

A Black girl with gorgeous dark skin and a badass fro claps Brian on the shoulder and says, “Oh, a real brother?”

And Brian flushes, his eyes going wide as he jumps in to defend my manhood or whatever. “Yeah, of course he’s my real brother. Why would you think he’s not real? He’s totally valid—”

“Brian,” I say, using a cough to cover the laughter bubbling up in my chest, “pretty sure she means not a frat brother.”

Brian lets out a rush of air and says, “Oh, yeah, of course. Biological brothers.”

The girl laughs, and Brian awkwardly shuffles me away to introduce me to the rest of the party. I don’t know what he’s expecting out of it since it’s not like I intend to remember more than like two names. The highlight of today is supposed to be the free hamburgers, which aren’t even ready yet. Sigh.