Someone who gets along with your family and welcomes you into theirs.

Someone who understands that you eat like a monster, and supports you with good food.

Someone who’s honest and vulnerable with you, and lets you be a headstrong asshole, but in a good way.

Someone who makes you smile.

And I can already feel tears brimming in my eyes because of course Becca could look past all my must acknowledge Miley Cyrus can’t actually sing bullshit and get to the heart of what I really need. And of course she’d lay it down and make me swear to only read it when I really needed it so I wouldn’t be able to bog the message down with a bunch of fairy-tale garbage.

And, of course, it doesn’t apply to Drew.

Of course it applies to Devin instead.

Tears race down my cheeks as I pick up my phone even though I don’t know what I’m hoping to get out of it. I’ve lost the Diary. I’ve lost Drew. And frankly, after my messy departure, I doubt Devin wants anything to do with me either.

But as I stare at my screen, I know exactly who I want to talk to even before my finger touches the contacts app and pulls up the number.

I call Becca even though I know I’m not supposed to, and when she actually answers the phone, I just start crying, tears drowning out every word I wanted to say.

“Noah? Noah, are you okay?” she asks.

And I can’t speak because I’m sobbing too hard.

Finally, she cuts me off and says, “Are you at home? Do I need to get a flight out to—”

“No,” I say, though my voice is still thick with tears.

And I can practically feel her confusion through the phone, but I need to be reasonable. She’s gonna make a whole trip out to see me just so I can cry into her shoulder about all this stuff, but that’s so selfish of me. And worse, it’s not gonna help our relationship. I have to accept that she’s right, and when the summer ends, Becca and I will be living across the country from each other. If I can’t handle this alone, I’ll never survive being in California.

Finally, she sighs and says, “Okay, fine, tell me what happened. But if you’re in trouble, you bet your ass I’m coming.”

I take a deep breath and catch her up on everything, including the Drew fiasco and the realization that I came to in Devin’s room.

“So?” she says as I finally finish the story.