Honestly, that distance is the only reason I’m even letting myself consider going along with Brenden’s plan.

“We’d have to be careful,” I warn him. “But if we only need to act like a couple around them and May, it should be okay.”

His eyes fly wide. “Oh my god. May! Just slap me and call me stupid.”

“Huh?”

“I’m such an idiot! I need another piece of pizza.”

I have no idea how that’s going to help anything. But I offer him my untouched slice, which he doesn’t hesitate to take, even though there’s plenty left in the boxes on the counter. “Why are you an idiot?”

“I’ve been so busy freaking out, I didn’t stop to consider how May factors into this. I’d obviously have to tell her what we’re doing. She’ll think I’ve lost my mind!”

“I think you may have lost your mind,” I say. Because I’m willing to help him with this plan if it’s what he really wants to do, but that doesn’t mean I think it’s a particularly good plan.

He squints his eyes like he’s trying to glare, but it gives off more of a disgruntled puppy vibe than a threatening one. Then he sighs and picks at the pizza, pulling off some of the cheese. “I probably have. But I dunno. It’s like... I wonder if maybe they’re right? Maybe I am doing a shitty job here. Am I the worst parent in the world because I’m considering asking my kid to lie to her grandparents for me?”

The anguished look he gives me breaks my heart.

How can he even think he’s a shitty parent? I’ve seen the way he’s raised May all these years. Every kid deserves parents that dedicated to them. If one day May has something important to tell her dad about herself, I’m sure she won’t be scared to do it.

“You’re doing the best job a parent could,” I tell him. “You and May have an incredible relationship. Just talk to her. She’ll either agree to go along with this, or she’ll tell you she’s not comfortable with it. And if she says that, then I know you won’t do it, because you always put her first.”

He takes a bite and chews slowly. As I watch him, taking in his features—the black-framed glasses, his defined jawline, his perfectly sculpted eyebrows, plump bottom lip glistening with grease and just about begging to be bit—it hits me that even though this is probably a bad idea, I almost want to do it. Some crazy, selfish part of me wants to know what it would feel like, pretending to be his boyfriend.

I bet it would feel good.