Chapters (33)
- Cover
- About the Author
- By the same author
- Dedication
- Part One
- 1. May
- 2. May
- 3. June
- Part Two
- 4. July
- 5. August
- 6. October
- Part Three
- 7. October The Night After the Party
- 8. November Three Weeks After Ash’s Death
- 9. November
- Part Four
- 10. November
- 11. November
- 12. November
- Part Five
- 13. November
- 14. November
- 15. March
- Part Six
- 16. April
- 17. April
- 18. April – Same Day
- 19. May
- 20. December
- Epilogue
- Acknowledgements
- THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING
Ash runs his truck lightly over Noah’s back. Sorrel pushes her little brother away.
‘Noah wants to sleep,’ she says.
Poppy looks up. ‘Izzy will think you’re being mean to Ash, Sorrel. She doesn’t like mean people.’
Sorrel puts her thumb in her mouth, tears bulge then slide slowly down her cheeks.
‘Jesus.’ Poppy rolls her eyes.
Eve needs to hurry supper, everyone’s tired. ‘Wash hands, please, food’s nearly ready.’
The children jostle briefly at the sink and she washes her hands afterwards, noticing with a little jolt that her ruby ring isn’t on her finger. And then she remembers, she left it on the bedside table this afternoon. She hurries upstairs and into their room, her hand outstretched, but she halts with a sick sense of shock; the ring has gone. She moves the pile of books and then the lamp to no avail; with growing panic she searches the floor under the table and then under the bed. Feeling breathless, she shakes out the duvet and the pillows. Nothing. Her precious ruby engagement ring that cost Eric all his savings twelve years ago has completely vanished.
‘I’m starving.’ Sorrel’s plaintive voice floats upstairs.
‘Sit down at the table, sweetheart,’ she calls back. ‘I won’t be long.’
She straightens the bed covers, heart thumping. Eric knows she only removes the ring before lovemaking; did he find it on the bedside table on his return? Has he guessed? He might have taken it to punish her and be waiting to gauge her response. She stands quite still, trembling, forcing herself to stay calm. It’s far more likely it was knocked somewhere when Martin pulled the duvet off the bed; maybe he discovered it on the floor and put it somewhere safe, forgetting to tell her.
‘Mum!’
She hurries downstairs. The children are sitting in their places; Sorrel looks unhappy, Poppy impatient, Ash is half-asleep. Eve puts the casserole on the table and lights candles with an unsteady hand. Eric enters and sits down silently, his expression serious. How can she ask him if he has her ring? If he hasn’t, his suspicions will be aroused; if he has, what then? He might begin to question her; what would she say? She needs an excuse, something convincing; her thoughts spin. She cuts the baked potatoes and slides in butter then serves everyone with the casserole, fragrant with wine, dark mushrooms and onions.
‘So how did it go today, Pops?’ She forces herself to sound bright.
Poppy shrugs, pushing her food around her plate. It might be wiser not to pursue her with questions tonight. She looks tired, her face is closed; tomorrow would be better. Sorrel glances at Noah as she eats, she looks worried. Ash’s eyelids droop with tiredness. Eric smiles at the children; the kitchen seems as peaceful as it always does at supper, but below the table her hands twist in her lap.
‘More food anyone?’