“Let me choke on your cock, A-Xiao.”

“Fine—fine! I—ngh—I l-love—I love you. Now please.”

“Say it like you mean it.” Weiran mouthed at the wet spot that had formed on the fabric of Xiaokai’s underwear. He’d gotten hard too—Xiaokai could see the bulge of it—but he hadn’t touched himself, hadn’t even tried. It was like he really only wanted Xiaokai to say it, really only wanted to get Xiaokai into his mouth.

“I love you, Weiran.” Xiaokai, with a great amount of difficulty, reached up and put his hand against Weiran’s face. “I love you, okay? I hate how vulnerable you make me and I hate how vulnerable it is to admit it, but I love you, and you’re first person who made me feel loved, and I love you.”

Weiran smiled, kissed Xiaokai’s palm, and then he swallowed him down.

Xiaokai almost wept from the relief. He thought at the beginning of his realization that he loved Weiran—he’d thought that he would be able to hold on a lot longer than could Weiran. After all, he’d spent his entire life learning how to have sex and last as long as he needed to, and Weiran had—what, lost his virginity at seventeen at a high school party? Fumbled through the next decade in one-night stands? Jerked off for a year and a half at the mere thought of his best friend in college? When one compared the two of them—when one compared their experience—it should be reasonable to assume that Xiaokai was the one who maintained control, Xiaokai was the one who had the lead, Xiaokai was the one who brought Weiran trembling to his knees. But that wasn’t exactly the case. Weiran was comfortable in his feelings. He’d come to terms with them a long time ago. In fact, it might have even been in his favor that they slept together first—Weiran had gotten over the hurdle that he could never overcome with Xingyu right off the bat. He’d been in love with Xingyu for so long, so he was comfortable with such emotions, and Xiaokai coming onto him so strongly had made him comfortable with sex, too.

But Xiaokai?

Xiaokai’s relationship with Weiran started the same way as usual: sex. That part was easy for him. It was natural. And then came in all of these feelings that he wasn’t used to, and then those feelings started interfering with the way he had sex with Weiran, and now every time they slept together he turned into this…mess.

Writhing under Weiran. Clutching at his shoulders. Like Weiran had been the whore all along, like Xiaokai was his client. Weiran took it all in stride.

His mouth parted from Xiaokai’s cock and for a moment he just smiled up at him from between Xiaokai’s legs. “I love you,” he said.