My heart balloons until it will surely burst, and I sob, inviting in the lake. As I choke, my throat scorches and my legs grow heavy, too heavy to move. Held hostage in chilly limbo, I stare into the hazy water, my useless arms floating in front of me. What strikes me most is the silence settling into my core, making room for the Lonely to reside. It would be easy to submit to the tantalizing darkness, to let the cool kiss take me, but some gut reflex won’t let me go. Of their own volition, my legs kick, getting tangled in the vintage Balenciaga dress Mom said would be the envy of the party, and there’s no way I’m letting that be the weight that drags me down. Lungs screaming, I push for life, clawing my way through wreckage until I break the surface with a pop.

I gasp, burned air searing my raw throat as I scan the lake for a sign of life—for evidence any of my friends are still part of mine—but all I find is unrecognizable fragments of my old existence sinking to watery graves. A fire smolders in the distance. Unwilling to believe the inevitable, I bob and dip my way toward it, my dress clinging to my legs, hindering my progress. I hike it up to my chest so I can move freely, but it’s still a fight for my exhausted limbs to keep my head above water. When I finally arrive at the charred remnants, it’s obvious the yacht is gone.

I’m alone.

If I could let the water swallow me, I would, but now that I’ve chosen to live, I can do nothing else.

A siren sounds on the breeze, reminding me of the plan.

This isn’t how it was supposed to happen, but it can still work. I’ve got to hide.

Walling off the desperation that squeezes my heart, adrenaline takes over, giving me strength to paddle toward shore. This night can haunt me later.

Crawling out of the lake, I sprawl on the beach, sucking in precious air for as long as I dare. Still breathless, I limp into the woods. My temples throb and I long to return to the house and climb into bed, to huddle under the blankets until the shivering stops. Last chance to keep my old life. I could come out of this a survivor. My parents would be so proud… Once the story hit the Networks, my Influencer status would be reinstated—especially now that everyone who knew my family’s secret is…dead.

Isn’t that convenient?

I don’t dwell on who’s behind the explosion. Maybe part of me already knows the truth, but I’m not ready for it. Instead, the final fleeting glimpse I had of my best friend, Deena, her blond hair whipping across her face right before the blast, assaults me.

Doubling over, I swallow the sickness rising in my throat, shutting my eyes against her. We weren’t speaking, but she didn’t deserve this. None of them did. Tears bubble down my cheeks. Dropping to my knees, I stare up at the starry sky, an irrevocable ache seeping through me. How can I be in this world without them? Wherever they are, can they see me? The universe is endless, and the stars shine down without even a wink.