‘I’m still scared, yes.’ And it was true, I could hear the shiver of it in her voice. ‘But if it’s so valuable, how could I not be frightened of losing it all? When I stopped seeing him I realised that I couldn’t bear not to be with him. My skin felt cold. My heart seemed to beat less regularly. It’s as physical as that, but it inhabits every corner of my mind as well. I didn’t know that this is how it feels to be in love.’

Mel sounded humble, even awed – my dismissive, comical Mel who had always been so certain that she would never love anyone as much as she had loved her daddy.

‘That’s how it happens,’ I said.

We made a date to have dinner together later in the week.

‘Suzy makes bacon in the mornings,’ Jack said at the breakfast table. His eyes looked small, as if he had slept too much.

‘Really?’ I wasn’t going to rise to that one. I was writing overdue cheques for the telephone and electricity, to stave off the threatened disconnections. ‘What have you got on at school today?’

He didn’t answer.

‘What time will you be home?’

A cunning look crossed his face. He poured milk into a bowl, slopping some of it on the table as he put the carton down. ‘Why? Will you be here?’

‘You know what time I usually get in. I have to work, Jack.’

‘Suzy doesn’t.’

‘Well, bully for her.’

‘I’m going to Audrey’s after school.’

I put my biro down in the clutter covering the table. Jack took a slow spoonful of cereal and deliberately, sloppily chewed on it while he stared defiance at me.

‘What about your homework?’

‘I’ll do it there. Audrey helps me. She’s at home, isn’t she?’

‘Okay.’ I found the envelope for the electricity bill and stuffed the counterfoil and my cheque into it. There was no point in arguing this issue. Let him go to Audrey’s, if that was what he wanted. ‘Make sure you’re back for supper.’ I got up from the table to search for a stamp. ‘And it’s time to go to school now.’

He made no move. Perhaps I was getting tired of loving Jack too much.

‘I don’t want to go.’

‘Don’t, then,’ I said. I found the stamps and put the letters into my bag.

By the time I was ready to leave the house, Jack was there before me.

‘Say hi to Audrey for me.’ I smiled.

He shrugged and hoisted his bag on to his shoulder. I watched him as he trailed away up the road and turned the corner.

As I drove to the Works I was thinking that I could turn the Audrey situation round, if I was clever enough. I would talk to Lola about it when she came home.