You’re lying to your sisters, I thought, with a savage burst of self-loathing. Who was I – Richard bloody Nixon? But then I just ploughed straight ahead and lied some more.

‘The point is, it’s terminal. I can either have loads of expensive, invasive, hideous, shit treatments and still end up dead, or I can enjoy my last moments.’ I handed the menus back to the passing waitress. ‘I’ve ordered for you both, by the way, as I know you’ve gotta get back to work,’ I said, buying time while working out what on earth to say next.

‘I bet your doctor wasn’t too happy about that frickin’ decision,’ Emerald said. ‘Shouldn’t we get a second opinion?’

Deceiving my sisters like this was making my cheeks flush so hotly I could have roasted marshmallows on my face. But I continued pushing the lies out of my mouth the way an instructor shoves first-time parachutists out of an aircraft.

‘Basically, Kev has spread so far that the doc understood my decision to avoid additional torture and just let Kev have his way with me with good grace,’ I ad-libbed. ‘At least I won’t lose my hair.’

I might be the runt of the Ryan litter, but I had been blessed with my father’s wild, curly, Celtic red hair, which makes it look as though I’m having a million brainwaves all at once. Which I suppose I am, most of the time, for short stories and poems and novels I start and never finish. Yes, I’m afraid I have literary leanings, which my mother has always discouraged. ‘You can barely write a cheque,’ she’d chide, or something along those sarcastic lines.

‘What about targeted gene therapy?’ Emerald persevered.

I know that liars look shifty – their eyes dart and their heart rates accelerate, so I tried hard to breathe evenly, to keep eye contact, my hand covering the jumpy pulse in my neck. ‘The doc reckons it’s insufficiently tested to be of any use to me.’ Liar, liar, pants on fire! ‘I don’t know how much longer I’ll have, but I won’t be wasting any of it poisoning myself . . . because I’ll be on a cruise with my beloved sisters.’

‘Seriously? Your first reaction was to book a cruise with us? That’s nuts, but I do love you for that response,’ Amber said, tears trickling through her rouge.

‘Ditto,’ grumbled no-nonsense Emerald. ‘Nuts but nice.’ She squeezed my hand under the table.