“Maybe.”

“Anyway, that’s insane,” Jahan said. “Absolutely insane. But seriously, why didn’t you just tell us that?”

“I don’t know,” I said. “I guess I didn’t want you guys to assume anything. I didn’t want to have to explain. I thought you would have all these questions, or think I just left my family and didn’t give them a chance. But I knew. I knew they wouldn’t . . . Anyway, that’s why Rome has been so amazing. When I got here, I was sad because I felt like my real family had already rejected me, but then you guys swooped in and became my family. It was so surreal. All those times we were drinking prosecco in the park together, I wanted to pinch myself. Or when you and your friends would be belting those old singers you love, it was like American fucking Idol. I didn’t want to ruin that. I didn’t want it all to go away.”

Jahan said nothing. His lips were pressed into a tight half smile.

“My whole life, I’ve felt like I was fighting this losing battle at home, with who I was.” I fumbled for the right words. “I was keeping a scoreboard—it’s hard to explain, but the points were never in my favor. They just weren’t. Then I came to Rome, and the points started adding up, you know? They were finally in my favor, and I felt like I was winning.”

“That’s sweet, Amir. It really is,” Jahan finally said. “But maybe now you can give your family a chance? At the very least, it seems like they want to talk to you.”

“Maybe,” I said with a sigh.

But Jahan wasn’t done. “I just wish you hadn’t lied to us,” he continued. “That’s all. You can’t be doing this shit, buddy. We all believed this really bad thing had happened to you, and—”

“A really bad thing did happen to me.”

“Well, yeah, of course. But you know what I mean. It sucks what happened, but it also sucks that you didn’t feel you could be honest about it with us.”

I didn’t want to be angry at Jahan. I really didn’t. But something in me needed more than just “it sucks” from him.

“Well. I’m sorry I lied,” I muttered.

Jahan gave me a look. “Hey, no need to roll your eyes. I’m just saying, I wish you had trusted us. I’m not angry at you. It’s just, on top of this Giovanni thing, well . . . none of this is ideal, let me tell you that. None of this.”

“Yeah, well, what happened to me back home wasn’t ideal, either.”

“Oh, come on, Amir. Don’t make me out to be the asshole here.”

“I’m not calling you an asshole!” I realized, too late, that I was shouting now.

Jahan opened his mouth to say something but stopped. “Amir, you’re giving me a real headache right now. This is the last thing I need. First you hook up with Giovanni and his relationship blows up, and then you lie to us—”