Chapter Nineteen

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Jane Mendoza

Beau already knows that Lauren Michaels was here. The security guards probably called and told him about the visitor.

Sometime after her visit, it starts to rain. It sends a chill through the warm summer air, making it feel like winter again. I’m sitting on the screened front porch in a cushioned wicker chair when the dark green Jeep careens up the mountain. Beau pulls to a stop. I can only see his shadow through the windshield, but I feel his intensity as he steps out and slams the door. Determination has darkened his expression, making him appear angry. A shiver runs through me. It’s fear. I’m not afraid of Beau. He wouldn’t hurt me, but I can’t help the instinctive response. I lived too long under the rule of violent men in foster homes to be comfortable.

“Absolutely fucking not,” he says again, standing on the step. He’s still getting rained on, two feet away from the overhang, but he doesn’t seem to notice. Rain hits his face. Wind whips his hair. An unzipped jacket does nothing to protect him from the elements. He looks stronger than them, anyway. More powerful than the storm.

I try to keep my breathing even. I don’t want to show him that I’m afraid. Men don’t understand. Maybe even women wouldn’t understand if they’ve never been hit by a man. That is something Emily and I have in common. “You don’t even know what she said to me.”

“I can guess. Why the hell else would she show up when I’m gone?”

“You’re being paranoid. She doesn’t know your schedule.”

He snorts. “Don’t underestimate her. She’s using you.”

“She’s using me to put away a murderer, Beau. How is that wrong?”

“It’s wrong because his focus is off you now. He’s busy with the goddamn trial. Busy covering his ass. Busy talking to reporters. He’s not thinking about you anymore, but he will. If you’re on that stand, all his rage will focus on you—again. He’s dangerous, Jane.”

“I know he’s dangerous, which is why it makes even more sense that I help put him away.”

“This isn’t your fight. It’s about Joe Causey being a dirty fucking cop and a murderer. What he did to you shouldn’t even have to factor in. That’s what Lauren said, remember? That you wouldn’t have to testify, because they have a strong enough case without it.”

“It’s the interview. It’s swaying public opinion. And the opinion of the jurors. She thinks they might lose.”

“The jury that’s supposed to be sequestered?”