“Please leave.” It’s a struggle for the word, and once I’ve said it, the pain in Mateo’s eyes is its own punishment. “Go. I need you to go.”

“I don’t have anywhere to be. Emily, it’s all right. Let me—”

“No.” I scramble out from underneath him and get to the other side of the bed. It doesn’t feel good to be naked now. It feels awful and vulnerable and cold. I want walls between me and Mateo. Locks and walls. I want to be hidden from view. “Please leave.”

He’s stunned. I hate it. I hate the hurt in his eyes and the slope of his shoulders as he puts his clothes back in place.

“Are you sure?”

No. Stay.

“Please get out,” I whisper. “Please.”

He goes, and I stand at the window and watch his car until he’s out of sight.

Chapter Twenty-Six

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

Jane Mendoza

The courtroom is small, which makes sense because Eben Cape is a small town.

Now it’s filled to the brim. The media has latched onto this case with all its teeth. The seats are packed with men and women writing notes. They aren’t allowed to bring cameras and microphones inside, but that doesn’t stop them from reporting word for word.

I have a seat in the front row, beside Beau.

Wood paneling designed to make the room look distinguished mixes with cheap ceiling tiles and the faint smell of cleaning supplies. As I’m looking around I catch a man sketching me. The woman on the page looks solemn and slightly afraid.

I quickly turn away from him.

Beau takes my hand and squeezes.

He’s not happy I’m here. Things have been tense between us since I agreed to testify, but he appeared outside the SUV when it was time to go.

Even though he hates this, he won’t let me face it alone.

The judge is a black man with a permanent scowl. He presides over the proceedings with very little patience. I’m not sure if that works in our favor or against it. Probably both, at times.

Lauren Michaels stands up. “Your Honor, I call witness Jane Mendoza to the stand.”

A trembling starts deep in my stomach. I feel like I’m about to throw up. Confrontation has always scared me, but this is escalated to a thousand. Especially when he nods, and Lauren gestures me forward. Beau squeezes one more time and then releases my hand.