The admissions advisor Mary Monroe had acted like I was a shoo-in, but I know better. My grades were decent, but I didn’t have a fancy SAT prep class. Or the money to do extracurriculars.

My application isn’t as strong as other students’.

The fact that Kevin already has his acceptance makes me nervous. Though he’s in a completely different department than me. I pull the black metal handle, revealing a neat stack of mail. Because the house is new, and the address is new, we don’t get a lot of junk.

There are a couple letters for Beau.

A promotional postcard inviting me to a campus tour in upstate New York.

And a letter from Mainland College. The logo of an abstract mountain range looks unassuming. Ordinary. I imagine some clerk stuffing envelopes and stamping them, her mind on other things. Music playing on her phone. Calm and relaxed, nothing like the panic I feel now.

Should I wait until Beau gets back? He’s out with Mateo.

No, I definitely can’t wait that long. I’m not even sure how much longer he’ll be gone, but even one more second is too long to wait. I don’t even bother climbing the mountain again. I work my finger beneath the envelope flap, standing on the patch of grass beside the mailbox.

Besides, I reason, if I don’t get in, I’ll be able to hide my disappointment from Beau.

Though, maybe not. It feels like my disappointment would be miles wide. This is the best school, the one I’m most excited to attend, the one where I already have friends.

And the one that’s closest to Paige.

I open the folded piece of paper with shaking hands.

Dear Jane,

Your thoughtful application and remarkable background are the hallmarks of a great student.

My heart pounds out of my chest. I don’t ever want a letter to start with a compliment. That means there’s a but coming. Something like: but we have even better students than you.

I force myself to keep reading.

Your unique perspective would be a great addition to our student body. Therefore it is with great pleasure that I offer you admission to Mainland College, Department of Social Work.

A shout of joy escapes me, and Brian jerks to attention, looking alert and wary.

I wave the paper in his direction. “Good news. I got accepted.”

His expression doesn’t change, but I sense the smile in his eyes. “Congratulations.”

Grown-ups who get called ma’am should probably handle such news with grace.

Instead I find myself doing a little dance in the sunlight, unable to contain the excitement. It’s coursing through my body like electricity, and I laugh with abandon.

The corner of Brian’s mouth turns up.

Then he looks away from me, and his expression turns grim.