‘I don’t like talking about it because people are so nosy. Always wanting to know what it was like to be the last person to see her alive.’ She doesn’t sound worried or guilty or sad, but perhaps that’s what thirty years does. ‘And the irony is, what happened that morning is nothing compared to what happened afterwards. It destroyed my family.’ There’s a tinge of anger in her voice now. I stay quiet.

‘After word went around that the police had interviewed my dad, people would not stop talking about it. It followed him everywhere. “That man who did something to Lily.” “No smoke without a fire.” And there were no grounds for it. No reason to interview him, even. It was so wrong.’

I’m trying to put myself in her shoes. It must have been dreadful. And maybe I’d have felt the same. But some part of me thinks any logical person would understand that the police had to investigate. And they must have had good reason for interviewing Victor O’Brien.

‘The thing is …’ She pauses. ‘The thing is, what happened was all my fault.’

19

June 2018

CORA IS JUST INCHES from my face, staring straight at me, and I have no idea how to respond to what she’s just said. What happened was all my fault. Does she mean because she was with Lily that morning and left her alone? Or something else entirely? Did she see something? Or do something? The silence goes on too long, demanding a reply. I clear my throat.

‘Cora, it wasn’t your fault. You were only a child.’

‘That’s not what I mean. It’s something my mother told me shortly before she died.’

‘Oh?’

‘The police never interviewed my dad. They came to our house a number of times, but it was always to speak to me.’

‘Because you were the last one with her, I presume?’

‘No, it was more than that.’ Her skin flushes. ‘Someone – I don’t know who – reported me. Said I was hurting Lily.’

My mouth drops open but I have absolutely no idea what to say.

Cora keeps talking, her voice laced with anger.

‘I never knew at the time. I remember the police coming and I think I remember them speaking to me, but as far as I understood, they were here to see my dad. That’s what she told everyone.’

‘Who?’

‘My mother. She may not have bothered with hugs or affection, but appearances mattered. She didn’t want people saying I did something to Lily. She didn’t want it tainting me for the rest of my life, preventing me from becoming a doctor or lawyer or finding the right husband.’ A wry smile now. ‘So when people noticed the police car at the house and started gossiping, she made my dad step up. She let people think the police were here to see him.’

‘Oh God.’

‘I think she assumed that because my dad was a successful businessman, people wouldn’t take it seriously, but it blew up and spread like wildfire.’