The mass of the not-quite dead cry as we leave, and I whisper over my shoulder: I’ll be back.

I promised Theo I would.

Halfway to the ALC, Aisha staggers. “They were kids,” she whimpers. “They were kids.”

“It doesn’t matter if they were kids,” Cormac snaps, and Aisha punches him in the stomach. Nobody helps when he folds and throws up on the sidewalk.

Chapter 13

Stand on any roof, wall, or hill tonight and watch the world slow down. Watch it empty. Watch it return to the paradise our Lord intended. This is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Isn’t it beautiful?

—Diary of Sister Kimberly Jones

Three people welcome us back to the ALC: Alex, Sadaf, and Erin. Nobody else.

Erin nearly collapses with relief, wrapping Salvador in her arms because xe’s the first person she can reach. Alex counts us twice, checks the blackboard in the lobby, and counts us again. Satisfied that everyone has come back, they leave. Sadaf leads Aisha away, promising Faith she’ll take care of her. Every other person in the ALC, if they have the misfortune to come through the lobby at that exact moment, ducks their head and leaves.

We take turns changing out of our black uniforms in the laundry room, except Nick, who disappears upstairs. Some of us take longer than others. I’m in and out in a minute, jamming the clothes in a bin, while Erin helps Salvador get xyr arm out of the sleeve due to a nasty scrape. Erin says she’ll let Sadaf know, because someone should really look at it. Salvador insists xe’s fine, xe’s fine, it’s nothing to worry about, please don’t take her away from Aisha.

Then we pull just enough water to clean ourselves and draw straws for order. I get the shortest straw, and Faith tries to protest, but I hide it before she can take it. By the time the water gets to me, it’s cold and murky. I dunk my hair and scrub an old washcloth across my arms, and I don’t let myself take long because if I do I’ll try to scrub off my skin.

For the rest of the day, I struggle to keep down food and catch fragments of sleep. People avoid me in the kitchen and the halls. I check the mirror to make sure Seraph hasn’t etched itself deeper into my body, but there’s nothing there I hadn’t seen before.

I did good. I made them suffer. I did it.

Theo still loves me.