“Is that, like, something you don’t do at all anymore? Like, did it get out of control or something like that?”

“Are you asking me if I have a drug problem or an alcohol problem?” I narrowed my eyes.

“I was just wondering—”

“Okay. Do I look like I have a drug or alcohol problem?” I asked, doing my best to look extremely serious.

“What? No! God, no. I—”

“Because, you know, if you’re going to regret anything—”

“I’m not regretting anything! I—”

As fun as it was watching him completely lose his cool, I couldn’t keep it up. I had to end his misery before he hyperventilated.

“It’s fine, I’m just fucking with you.” I laughed.

“No, seriously, Tom.” He shook his head, so very worried. “I wasn’t—”

“Baby, it’s okay,” I calmly told him.

I didn’t know why I said that. I’d never called anyone “baby” in my entire life; I had no idea where it came from.

“Yeah?” he asked, so nervous and elated all at the same time.

“Yes, I was only having a laugh. Why were you asking?”

“I just thought…since we have forty minutes to wait, we could maybe—”

“Get high?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Sure,” I said casually. “I mean, if it were me, I would’ve thought of something sexual…but drugs are fine too.” I shrugged.

“Shit, no. What I was—”

I smiled. “Baby. Breathe.”

*

“What do you believe in?” Ethan asked, handing me the blunt.

We were sitting on the kitchen floor, with our legs intertwined, facing each other.

“What do I believe in?” I brought the blunt to my lips and inhaled. “That’s a mouthful, right there.”

“I know,” he said, widening his eyes. “But are you religious? Do you even believe in religion?”

“Of course I believe in religion. It’s an actual thing,” I said, making him chuckle.

“You know what I meant.” He took the blunt between his fingers.

“I do,” I said, still holding the smoke in my lungs. “And no, I’m not religious at all. Are you?”

“Nah. It’s basically Santa, but for grown-ups.”

I laughed.

“But do you think there’s something out there, is what I’m asking,” he pressed. “Energy or fate or whatever?”

“I like the notion of infinity. Parallel universes, that sort of thing. That I believe in.” I reached up onto the counter I was leaning against for the bottle of Carménère and took a sip. “How about you?”

“Not big on fate, I’m afraid. I tend to think we make our own. But I believe in people, how they can sometimes be good. What do you like about infinity?”

“All the possibilities it presents?” I said as he leaned over, held the blunt to my lips, and waited for me to inhale. “I like how somewhere out there, you and I met differently, for instance.”

“Differently?”

“Sooner.” I handed him the bottle.