Something pleased and possessive washes over his expression, a response that makes my heart race and my blood warm. I wonder how he’d look at me if he knew my only sexual experiences have been with him.

I’m not brave enough to find out. I hand the bottle back and rest my head against the soft cushions. Focus on the screen, because this documentary about polar bears is one I’ve been wanting to watch.

“Why are you sitting so far away?”

I glance at Holden, then at the foot of space separating us. “Far away is a misnomer.”

“Stop talking like a nerd and move closer.”

“Wow. Such a sweet talker.”

He rolls his eyes. And then he moves, which I’m not expecting.

Holden is suddenly everywhere. A hot thigh presses against mine. A warm arm wraps around my shoulders, pulling me closer to him.

I don’t resist. I melt against him, feeling the ice around my heart thaw and crack. I tilt my head back, staring at the side of his jaw. The bruise there is faded now, nearly gone.

He doesn’t need to be sitting here, watching this. And he definitely didn’t need to glue our sides together.

“This is weird,” I whisper.

Holden rolls his head to the side so he’s looking at me. “Is it?” he asks before returning his attention to the screen.

And for the first time—ever—I consider that maybe he’s imagined this—us—too.

CHAPTER TEN

HOLDEN

Finn laughs, and it pulls me back to the present when I was just zoning out. The hard metal door I’m holding. The guys huddled around me. But then she appears, and I’m distracted again.

It was one thing ignoring Cassia at school before. It’s very different now. Knowing how she looks naked. How she tastes. How she looks on her knees. The sounds she makes when she comes.

Fuck.

I stop that line of thought in its tracks, scrubbing a palm across my face and forcing myself to focus on the books I’m looking at instead. I grab the two I think I’ll need tonight and shove them into my backpack.

Today is a day I’ve been looking forward to for months. It’s the start of the basketball season, the first practice of what will be many before we win a state championship or lose trying.

I’ve barely spared a thought about basketball all day. Cassia has more power over me than I realized.

I wasn’t planning for things between us to go as far as they did. I was planning to kiss her, since I hadn’t the Friday before. Prove to her the past weekend was more than a one-off.

Confirm that there’s something still between us, even if she wants to pretend otherwise. Ironic, since I’ve spent a good chunk of time pretending too.