That’s why I spent the entire night awake, holding her in my arms and watching her sleep. When her alarm vibrated, I forced my eyes closed, but I didn’t try to hide the tears that fell. She knew I was awake—and she left anyway.

She kissed me goodbye. She brushed the tears from my cheeks. She pressed her lips to mine one final time, and then she was gone.

I’m so proud of her. She’s getting on a plane, moving into a brand-new apartment, and gearing up to take eighteen credit hours this semester. I love the way she jumps into things, charging forward as if there’s no other speed. For Maddie, there isn’t. She either plays full out, or she doesn’t play at all.

It’s been two months since she forced herself into my life and made a home inside me. Two months that have brought about so many emotions, but the gratitude I feel trumps them all.

I worried all summer that I would regret letting her in or resent how deeply I care for her.

But there was never any uncertainty about what we shared. In a way, knowing we had a time limit allowed me to feel it all. I never tried to hold back or shelter my heart with her. Our inevitable ending allowed me to be happy—truly happy—for the short time we had together.

I’m still lying in bed recalling every detail of last night when there’s a rustling outside my door.

Maybe she forgot something. Or maybe…

I pick my phone up off the bedside table and check the time: 5:58 a.m.

My brother opens the door without knocking. He looks at my sorry state, crying in bed, surrounded by tissues. But instead of heckling me, he offers a sympathetic smile.

“I brought ice cream. Is it too early for ice cream?”

Today’s my first day back at The Oak. Fielding teased me about getting back to work so I could support his lifestyle, but I need normalcy to distract me from missing her.

That, and being here reminds me of her.

Fielding’s sitting at the bar, playing on his laptop, drinking a soda, and eating tots, which Jake now offers on a limited menu. It turns out it actually isn’t that hard to call Clinton’s and place an order for customers over here, then have one of the servers walk it over. Not that Jake would ever admit that to Maddie.

I’m glad my brother’s here, honestly. Jake’s been more tolerant of Fielding since our mom died. It gives me hope they might be friends again someday. Plus, I think Jake knows it helps me keep my head on straight if my brother’s close by.