Trying to remember how to breathe normally, Cora nodded. She tried to smile too. “It must be nice, after working so late at work all the time.”

His foot ran over hers. “You’ve no idea how tired I am after work. It’s exhausting.”

“I imagine.”

He used his foot to hook her under her ankle and twisted in his seat, pulling her legs towards the couch. Leaning forward, he pulled her feet onto his lap, reading an e-mail while his fingers ran over her feet, massaging the bottom.

It felt amazing. And that made her want to cry. She resisted the urge to pull her feet away and tuck them up and under her. Instead, she stared at the television and tried to follow the program. Measured her breathing. In and out. Tried to ignore the scratch of panic at the back of her brain.

It was easier when he behaved badly. When he forgot she was a person with thoughts and opinions.

There were times when Alec was the person she fell in love with years and years ago. When he touched her like she could break. Or stroked her skin like now, comfortable in what he was doing. Because why wouldn’t he be at home on his couch with his wife of ten years?

Ten years.

And she was going to shatter it.

Shatter his safe bubble.

In bed, hours later, she lay on her side, hoping he’d just sleep. The house settled around them, the odd creak and the groan familiar. With a rustle of the sheets, he rolled over. Her breath caught in her chest as his hand ran up her thigh, over her ribs.

Swallowing, Cora caught his hand in hers.

“I’m tired.” She whispered it towards the wall.

Sometimes it worked. For a long time, but especially the last few months, sex between them had been minimal anyway, something Cora had done only if pushed. As it had been the last few years, as she’d felt his grasp around her tighten, she’d not wanted the closeness of him against her, the intimacy it brought. But sometimes, saying no too much led to too much hassle. Questions.

After those few times in the last few months, Cora had always danced away from Frazer at work, lost in feelings of shame, the desire to bury herself in the sensations Frazer gave her, and the desire to erase the memory of Alec left on her skin. In the end she’d cave, falling into Frazer with desperation at her fingers.

But she couldn’t do that anymore. Not tonight. Not with what she knew she would be doing in a few more days.

“Cora.” He kissed the back of her neck, and it only made her wince. It left a hot spot on the back of her neck that would take hours to dull. “I go away for the weekend tomorrow.”