He let go and sat straight again. When I looked toward the house, his mother and father were standing by the window. “There are some things I need help with so I can go to New York. I was going to ask my parents and my sister. Now I don’t know if that will happen. I don’t know if I’ll be able to walk away from my parents and leave things like this.”

That was like a punch in the gut, because once again Elias was telling me the truth, never promising things that would make him betray what he’d said to me. “I don’t know much about anything, but I am certain that I’ll never be sorry for you.”

I nodded, literally biting my tongue from the need to beg him to assure me that we would be all right, that this would not be the last time I saw him. I needed to not add to the already overwhelming weight on his shoulders, to not be one more person in his life burdening him with their own needs and wants. I sat there, barely able to take a breath, knowing the hope I’d been harboring in the past few weeks had to be snuffed out, for both our sakes.

I felt someone shaking me, and I looked up. “Desta. I’m going to go inside to tell my mother I’m taking you home.”

“Okay.” I watched Elias get out of his car and walk up to his house, his shoulders straight and his head high, face determined. Looking at him being so brave, I swore to myself that if I ever got the chance to be with this man, I would do everything in my power to live up to that kind of courage and dignity.

He was only in the house a few minutes before he got back in the car and drove us out of the compound. His face was completely expressionless. I was too scared to ask how it went, so I sat in silence until we arrived at my guesthouse.

I assumed Elias would leave me by the entrance and head home, but he parked the car inside and got out with me. All the way up the stairs, the heavy silence was suffocating. I opened the door to the room and Elias walked inside as I followed him in.

As soon as the door was locked, we moved toward each other and embraced, Elias gripping me with such force that I almost whimpered. I was afraid to ask if this was goodbye. I was so scared I would never see him again.

“Konjo, I’m going to go soon, and I can’t promise you that I will see you before you return home. I have things to take care of so I can go to New York.”

I nodded as I held on to him my eyes shut tightly. “Okay. I know.”