We just look at each other and neither of us say dick until I say, “Yeah, we got a big fuckin’ problem.”

I walk away

And the fuck of it is…

He lets me.

[Off tape]

In the end, Trelane published his book, including a goodly number of images of Lyla, doing this without McCade’s permission.

Yeah, he did.

And Trelane’s book captured the interest of more than Roadmasters and Trelane’s fans. It is widely heralded as nuanced photojournalism of the disintegration of a rock band, starting with the band at its peak, ending with it all unraveling, and how this can come about without big internal or band-based public drama.

Yeah.

It is.

The Fast Lane

Jesse:

I’m sure it won’t surprise you that after years of popping whatever pill you thought would do the job, having a snort whenever you wanted to feed the need and imbibing liquor copiously is not something you can just decide to stop doing without repercussions.

The next coupla weeks on that tour were shaky, man.

Serious.

And the thing is, it gets worse before it gets better. Every night you go to bed and think, “Tomorrow won’t be this shitty,” and then you wake up and that day is shittier, and it really fucks with your head.

Because all you can think is, “I take a pill…” or “I do a line this all goes away.”

The only thing that stops you from doing that is the fact that you know, eventually you’re gonna have to try again and there’s one thing you’re certain about.

You do not wanna start from the beginning.

Even after, you know?

Coupla weeks go by and that’s only when you start to feelin’ better.

You don’t wake up one day and you’re all “I’m good. I’ll just go run a marathon.”

[Shakes head]

Hell no.

Folks give the stank eye to people who fall off the wagon, and I wanna say, “You know what, motherfucker. Give up running so much your knees are shit. Or give up that coupla glasses of wine you have every night. Or give up those Doritos. Or shoppin’. Or controlling every goddamn morsel of food that goes into your mouth because you can’t control the world around you.”

We all got a way to cope that we fall into.

And even if it isn’t chemically induced, it’s hard as fuck to kick, no matter how bad it is for you.

I’ll tell you one of many things I learned when I kicked the pills and blow.

I learned to cut some serious slack.

So, we’re cold turkey off the shit and we did not pick the best time, say, around a break.