The tall building looms in front of me, its spiral going all the way up to what looks like Rapunzel’s tower. Rapunzel, Rapunzel, forgive me my sins. I don’t like churches, not since the day the priest roared from the altar. He was bragging about some sort of miracle or prophecy when someone a few benches behind start laughing. The joy became contagious, infecting everyone around, until half the sinners were choking into their sleeves in an attempt to feign despair. The priest didn’t like it. He lifted his eyes and his voice, frightening all the younger members of his flock, including me.

I remember that day as if it was yesterday, Mom tightening her grip on my hand, trying her best not to laugh. It was a poor attempt on her behalf because tears rolled down her face into the lovely new pink lace gloves she’d been given for her birthday a couple of weeks earlier. Nervously I stood there, lips tightened, waiting for everyone who was laughing to disappear into thin air, banished by the Lord onto the devil’s radar. You fear like that when you’re only five years old.

‘Stop laughing Mom,’ I whispered. I didn’t think she heard me because she kept giggling, her shoulders shaking as she hid her face in her gloves. Standing up on the wooden pew, I leaned in close to her ear.

‘Stop laughing, Mom, or he’ll send you to hell.’

There’s no reason to laugh today. Edith is going home. Her coffin is moving up the aisle to the pleas of ‘Nearer, my God, to Thee.’ Bert walks behind, head bent, tears leaking from his frozen stare. Edith’s sister walks alongside, accompanied by an old man in an old suit and two younger guys. They must be Edith’s nephews.

A few neighbors are gathered in the pews, standing while the procession proceeds. In the distance, the priest stands waiting at the altar.

I glance around to see if Dad has shown up. I thought he might – the woman lived across the road from him since the beginning of time. Maybe he can’t face it, the preview, not able to stand here knowing his turn to walk up that aisle will arrive only too soon. Danny just flat out dismissed any possibility he might attend.

‘I’m too busy with work,’ he said.

Which left Joanna to appease me.

‘If I’m feeling okay I will pop down.’

I wanted them all to come, for as many people as possible to be here for Bert. But it looks like I’m the only Wall in the hall.