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Chapters (71)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Prologue
  4. Chapter One
  5. Chapter Two
  6. Chapter Three
  7. Chapter Four
  8. Chapter Five
  9. Chapter Six
  10. Chapter Seven
  11. Chapter Eight
  12. Chapter Nine
  13. Chapter Ten
  14. Chapter Eleven
  15. Chapter Twelve
  16. Chapter Thirteen
  17. Chapter Fourteen
  18. Chapter Fifteen
  19. Chapter Sixteen
  20. Chapter Seventeen
  21. Chapter Eighteen
  22. Chapter Nineteen
  23. Chapter Twenty
  24. Chapter Twenty-One
  25. Chapter Twenty-Two
  26. Chapter Twenty-Three
  27. Chapter Twenty-Four
  28. Chapter Twenty-Five
  29. Chapter Twenty-Six
  30. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  31. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  32. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  33. Chapter Thirty
  34. Chapter Thirty-One
  35. Chapter Thirty-Two
  36. Chapter Thirty-Three
  37. Chapter Thirty-Four
  38. Chapter Thirty-Five
  39. Chapter Thirty-Six
  40. Chapter Thirty-Seven
  41. Chapter Thirty-Eight
  42. Chapter Thirty-Nine
  43. Chapter Forty
  44. Chapter Forty-One
  45. Chapter Forty-Two
  46. Chapter Forty-Three
  47. Chapter Forty-Four
  48. Chapter Forty-Five
  49. Chapter Forty-Six
  50. Chapter Forty-Seven
  51. Chapter Forty-Eight
  52. Chapter Forty-Nine
  53. Chapter Fifty
  54. Chapter Fifty-One
  55. Chapter Fifty-Two
  56. Chapter Fifty-Three
  57. Chapter Fifty-Four
  58. Chapter Fifty-Five
  59. Chapter Fifty-Six
  60. Chapter Fifty-Seven
  61. Chapter Fifty-Eight
  62. Chapter Fifty-Nine
  63. Chapter Sixty
  64. Chapter Sixty-One
  65. Chapter Sixty-Two
  66. Chapter Sixty-Three
  67. Chapter Sixty-Four
  68. A Letter from Jackie
  69. Acknowledgements
  70. About the Author
  71. Also by Jackie Walsh

Danny switches on the light, chasing away the darkness.

‘It was early the following morning when she came into my room and told me we were going away for a while,’ he says. ‘She never said how long, but as I watched her pack all my clothes and toys I began to think we were not coming back. I sat on the bed crying… she told me everything would be okay, that I would love where she was taking me. But I could tell she was lying. I remember the pajamas I was wearing, the green army ones. I asked her would Dad know where to find us when he came back but she didn’t answer, just continued to shove everything into the case that she’d opened at the bottom of the bed. “Everything is going to be okay” she kept repeating but I could tell she didn’t believe it. Her nerves were obvious in the speed at which she was moving. Hurrying to get away. Like she was trying to escape. I told her I didn’t want to go but she just kept packing. “It won’t be forever,” she said, but I didn’t believe her.

‘When she had everything in the car we left. Mom drove for what felt like hours and hours. Saying very little, her eyes wide as she focused on the road ahead of her. Stopping only to take money out of bank machines. Eventually it got dark and she booked us into a motel for the night.

‘The following morning we got back into the car and traveled for most of the day, pulling into another motel that evening. The sun was still strong when she took me for a walk. I can still remember how it burnt into my skin as we passed through, what looked to me, like a real scary place. I was nervous but afraid to say anything. I could sense she was worried, gripping my hand tightly, pulling me along the pathway.

‘We came to a road that had all different kinds of homes, mostly trailers, some small wooden houses. The place was dirty, trash everywhere, bits of furniture and old cars strewn around yards blocked off by fences. I asked her if we could go home and she said, “Just as soon as we find a new one.” This made me even more scared – why were we looking for a new house? Why couldn’t we go back to our own? Who would let Dad know where we were? Dragging my feet, the sun burning my skin, I was hungry, thirsty, but most of all scared. While passing by one of the yards a large black dog lunged against a steel fence, barking mad. Then two, three or maybe more dogs followed, sending me into Mom’s arms. She ran with me.