Chapters (52)
Luke gritted his teeth and wondered why he was doing this.
Eventually, Orduroy’s mother, an older, tinier version of Orduroy’s sister, gestured to him to sit down. He perched himself nervously on the first chair that came to hand.
Still none of them spoke. The silence hung as heavy as the atmosphere in the room. With a flash of insight, he imagined long, long afternoons in this silent room waiting for a son who would never come again. The light of his mother’s life had disappeared. And add to that the resentment of the daughter who was still here, but had to live with not being her brother. The only photographs of his sister were those she shared with Orduroy. Luke wondered what job she’d had and whether she’d had to give it up to look after her mother. More lives than Orduroy’s had ended that night.
He knew that Ms Steel had informed them of the purpose of his visit so he cleared his throat nervously and began.
‘I wanted to talk to you. I wasn’t sure what to do for the best. I expect you already know . . . It was me . . . I was with Orduroy that night. I was with him at the table. I tried . . . I did my best to protect him . . . I didn’t want to embarrass him. Not in front of everyone. Please be clear, I could probably have stopped the game. But I didn’t. He was so . . .’
It occurred to him they wouldn’t want to hear about Orduroy’s weaknesses. Now was not the time.
‘I tried very hard not to . . . When I won, I wasn’t going to keep the money. I was going to give it back. I waited outside for him but he never came.’
Because Orduroy was already dead. Dead among the wheelie bins, the empty crates and all the other rubbish around the back of the club. Waiting to be disposed of.
He fell silent. Still neither woman spoke.
‘I don’t know if he ever mentioned me – we were quite good friends . . .’
‘A good friend would have had him out of a place like that in a heartbeat.’
The sister’s voice was harsh. He realised he didn’t know her name. He should have checked with Ms Steel first. He’d done it all wrong and if he wasn’t careful, he would only make everything very much worse.
He drew breath. ‘Yes, that is very true. I can’t deny it. I should have. And if I could have thought of a way of doing it without a scene that would be embarrassing to everyone, then I would have.’
‘Because that was more important?’
‘It was important to Orduroy.’
She had nothing to say to that.
He pushed on.