His father had been angry that January that Ben hadn’t stopped with one degree. He wanted his son home. They’d argued over the Christmas holiday, and Benjamin returned to the university early. For once in his life Benjamin wasn’t sure of himself. The workload had been far more than he’d anticipated the first semester at UT. He’d decided to move off campus with new roommates for his second semester.

But the week before classes started, there were parties, and Benjamin jumped in. Red had been his first lover, though neither talked of it.

When he’d come home for spring break two months later, he’d worked at the farm and somehow found his footing once more. His dad had talked to him about how proud he was of his only child. When Benjamin went back to school after that spring break, he went back with purpose. He pushed away the wild time he’d had, as if it never happened.

A year later another chemistry student, Marti Ranehart, walked into his life. She was like him, shy, studious. Their dates were to the library and to lectures. He’d thought they were just friends until one night she asked if he’d sleep over. The encounter was awkward for them both; almost like making love was a homework assignment they had to get through.

Throughout the semester, she’d ask him now and then to sleep over, and he thought they were improving a bit each time. Their lovemaking reminded him of two people dancing together while each listening to different music.

He thought they had moved into a relationship, maybe one that would eventually lead to marriage. But it turned out she just wanted to sleep with him every Wednesday. Sex relaxed her, she claimed. He remembered they’d had sex every night during finals, and then she’d politely said goodbye. She was going to Mexico for the summer to study and he was going back to the farm. She didn’t come back to school in the fall, and in truth, Ben barely missed her. In his memory he called her Marti Wednesday.

He found out online that she’d stayed on at the university in Mexico, but he didn’t try to contact her. What had started had never taken root. Now, analyzing their relationship, he couldn’t remember one thing that had truly attracted him to her.

Strange, he’d slept with Red one long weekend, and the memory of her filled his mind far more than the semester he’d been with Marti.

Benjamin stopped working on the tractor engine, closed his eyes, and tried to remember what Red had looked like. Chatty, funny, loving, bouncy, and short.