Caddie came to him, hesitating only a moment before hugging him. “I’m sorry,” she said.

He patted her back. “I’m not,” he said. “So don’t you be either.”

She let go and headed for the hall. “See you tomorrow,” she said, reaching out and touching Hudson’s shoulder.

“It already is tomorrow,” Hudson said to Ben as Caddie climbed the stairs. “I should be getting home.”

“Or you could stay,” Ben suggested.

Hudson tilted his head. “Or I could stay,” he repeated.

Ben looked at him. The feeling of fear was once again coming over him, the memory of their unfinished conversation of the previous morning replaying in his mind. He was reminded, again, that he didn’t know what the other night had meant—meant now—to Hudson.

“I don’t want to be alone,” he said finally.

“You aren’t alone,” Hudson reminded him, casting his eyes toward the ceiling and Caddie’s room.

Why is he making this so hard? Ben wondered. Unless he doesn’t want to stay. He looked down at the table, where his hands were worrying the remnants of a napkin.

“I’ll stay,” Hudson said, taking the shredded paper from Ben’s hands. Ben looked up at him. “But only if it’s because you want me here.”

“I do,” Ben told him. “I do want you. Here. With me.”

“Then I’ll stay,” Hudson said. “Come on.”

He took Ben’s hand and led him out of the kitchen, shutting off the light behind them. Up the stairs they went, and into Ben’s room. Hudson excused himself and went to the bathroom while Ben undressed. Standing in his shorts, he was suddenly very self-conscious. Should he put something else on? What was Hudson expecting? Their only other time together had been so sudden, so unplanned, that he hadn’t had time to worry about such things. Now he was afraid of looking foolish. Finally he pulled on a T-shirt and sat, uneasily, on the edge of the bed.

“Your turn,” Hudson said, opening the door and coming in. “I hope you don’t mind, but I borrowed a toothbrush. I assumed yours was the blue one. If it isn’t, don’t tell Caddie. We’re finally on speaking terms.”

“It’s the blue one,” Ben said. He was amazed that Hudson could be so casual about their situation. He seemed relaxed, whereas he himself was thinking about everything that could possibly go wrong. He envied Hudson this ability, wondered if it was something he would ever possess. In the meantime, he needed to pee.

“I’ll be right back,” he said, hurrying from the room.