That part of me, the killer I’ve believed I could be since that night on the beach years ago, is becoming colder and more comfortable, freer. That’s exactly why I lean in and press my lips to Kane’s. I need to feel something. I need to be human right now. He cups my head and kisses me the way only Kane can kiss me, and thank God, emotion stirs inside me, all the emotions a girl should feel when a man like Kane Mendez kisses her. He pulls back and stares down at me, knowledge in his eyes. He knows me. He knows what I’m battling but he hasn’t forced me to talk. I’m back to him knowing me. I need conversation like I need a hole in my head right now.

And when the kiss is over, and he’s firmly reminded me that yes, I am still human, I do still have emotions, he settles back in his seat. And so do I. I lower my head to the cushion when another time I’d pull out the cold case files that are part of my job. Murphy told me to pick my case, but what he meant was to look for cases that connect to the Society. I’m just not sure that really gets us anywhere, and I’m not exactly a spin-my-wheels-for-nothing kind of agent.

But my mind is on murder. Oh yes, it so fucking is.

The swoosh of the chopper blades and the hum of the engine lifting us off the ground transports me back to the moment when I’d launched myself at Roger and started stabbing him. Over and over, I stabbed him. And then he was dead. He is dead, there is no coming back from that, and the blood is still warm on my hands. He’d stabbed Kane. He’d bragged about killing all those innocent victims. He’d bragged about killing my mother at the direction of the Society, which means Pocher. And he’d assured me I was a killer like him. I’d happily proven him right.

My mind goes to my father, and his reaction to me being raped. “At least they didn’t kill you.” He knows the Society killed Mom, I know he knows, that statement tells me he knows, and still, still, he’s with them, using them for power and political office. I think of her beauty, her kindness, her goodness, that was too good for him, and me. I’m like him and he’ll know that soon when I make him pay for his part in all of this.