Jake was saying, ‘It’s just – I think it was my fault. I touched you. I was stroking your hair.’

‘Were you?’ She looked at him stupidly. ‘Why?’

‘Because . . . I don’t know. I suppose I wanted to do something for you. I thought you were asleep. Sorry. I feel ridiculous.’

‘No – don’t.’ She was moved by his care, felt a great need for it rise in her. ‘You were being kind.’ She looked up into his eyes. ‘If I’d been awake I’d have liked it. I feel so lonely.’

He moved closer to her, put an arm round her and pulled her to him, so her head was resting against his chest. She heard his voice quietly, ‘Me too.’ He stroked her hair again, gentle as a parent, and she held his other hand and listened to the beating of his heart. After a time both of them slept, comforted.

Chapter 36

Birds, she thought, when she woke the next morning. Even before opening her eyes she knew she was somewhere new. The light was different, coming from high on her right, bright, no curtains.

The window had been opened above the bed, and moving air touched her face.

‘Birds,’ she said.

‘Not the dawn chorus, though.’ Jake came across, offering her a mug. ‘Tea all right?’

She sat up, gratefully, trying to smooth her hair down. ‘Oh, I need this. What’s the time then?’ He was already dressed.

‘ ’Bout half-nine. I’ve just been down to open up. Sleep OK?’

‘Fine – thanks.’ She felt herself blushing. She last remembered falling asleep leaning against him, and vaguely recalled him moving her, lying her down again. She thought of his touching her hair, of this area of need and intimacy which had opened up between them. She looked up and smiled shyly at him.

He sat down at the far end of the bed. ‘Considering how little sleep we had last night, I don’t feel too bad.’

‘Nor me,’ she said, though she did feel muzzy. Silently she sipped the tea, strong, with a tang of something, Earl Grey perhaps. A bee flew in through the window, bumped its way a short distance along the wall and back, then found the white air again and disappeared.

‘Thanks for letting me stay.’

‘No problem.’ He smiled, face transforming. ‘I was enjoying the novelty of having someone else around.’

She could tell neither of them was going to mention last night, now daylight had come, both embarrassed or afraid.

‘How often does Elly stay?’

‘Every other weekend usually. Unless that upsets some other arrangement her mother has made.’

Anna nodded. Jake obviously found the situation difficult to talk about and she didn’t want to push it.

‘What were you doing before this – before the business, I mean?’

‘I told you – selling insurance.’

‘What? Really?’

‘Did you think I was joking?’ He gave a reluctant laugh. ‘I was training to be the man from the Pru. Nice safe job, suit, haircut, the lot. Life mapped out nicely.’