I talk about our first performance as a group—before I started using a stage name, but I leave that specific part out—and compare it to the arena I’m sitting in now. During story time, I play with the crowd. I raise my right arm to see what they’ll do. After that side roars, I swap to the other.

Xander looks slightly bewildered as he crosses to me. Without prompting, he sits three feet in front of me and crosses his legs like he knows what I expect of him. It almost has me impressed until I notice the position of his phone.

Sure enough, he nods. “Yeah, no problem.” He hands it to me, and the fucking match to my soul is right there on the screen.

“Hey,” I say to Remi.

“Hi. I have a feeling this interview won’t be what I had in mind.” She has her knees pulled up to her chest, head tipped to the side to rest on a couch cushion. When I smile, she sighs. “I hate when you go rogue.”

“Liar.”

“Any specific instructions from either of you?” Xander’s unfolded a tripod, and he switches on a light attached to his camera.

“Hold her for me.” I hand him his phone, and he keeps Remi facing me. “You ready to show me what a skilled interviewer you are, Rem?”

She blinks at me. “You haven’t told me anything, Adams.”

“Feel your way through it, baby. We’re giving the world a breadcrumb to run with. Think of it like a tease—you’re good at that.”

While she nails me with a glare, I nod at Xander, but I trust she’ll catch on quick.

Once Puppy starts rolling, he nods back.

I steady myself, banish the cutting sense of betrayal I’ve endured for far too long. My heart’s fallen in line with my head and body, and I say a silent, “Bye, Mama.”

This time, all I need to blow up Andrew West’s life is to provide the fuse.

44

REMI

Just like Foster said, he only offers a pile of breadcrumbs to indicate a trail.

The key is his wording. Hints he decided to separate himself from the toxicity of his family. Specific regions of the places he grew up. What his dad does for a living.

Once the documentary airs, whoever wants it will know there’s something to find. Enough to unbury the line between Adams North, the man the world has fallen in love with, and the abusive asshole who managed to make him feel like he wasn’t worthy of love.

Later, he calls from the bus to assure me I can use the footage in the doc. He tells me why he decided to set it in motion now, and for the first time I truly wish I’d stayed on tour. Simply for tonight.