Back Before Now
Chapters (123)
  1. PLAYLIST
  2. CONTENT NOTE
  3. Dedication
  4. 1
  5. REMI
  6. 2
  7. FOSTER
  8. 3
  9. REMI
  10. 4
  11. REMI
  12. Before…
  13. 5
  14. REMI
  15. Now…
  16. 6
  17. FOSTER
  18. 7
  19. FOSTER
  20. Before…
  21. 8
  22. REMI
  23. Now…
  24. 9
  25. FOSTER
  26. 10
  27. REMI
  28. Before…
  29. 11
  30. FOSTER
  31. 12
  32. REMI
  33. Now…
  34. 13
  35. FOSTER
  36. 14
  37. FOSTER
  38. Before…
  39. 15
  40. REMI
  41. 16
  42. REMI
  43. 17
  44. REMI
  45. Now…
  46. 18
  47. FOSTER
  48. 19
  49. FOSTER
  50. Before…
  51. 20
  52. REMI
  53. 21
  54. FOSTER
  55. 22
  56. REMI
  57. Now…
  58. 23
  59. REMI
  60. Before…
  61. 24
  62. FOSTER
  63. Now…
  64. 25
  65. FOSTER
  66. Before…
  67. 26
  68. REMI
  69. Now…
  70. 27
  71. FOSTER
  72. Before…
  73. 28
  74. FOSTER
  75. Now…
  76. 29
  77. REMI
  78. Before…
  79. 30
  80. REMI
  81. Now…
  82. 31
  83. FOSTER
  84. 32
  85. REMI
  86. 33
  87. FOSTER
  88. 34
  89. REMI
  90. 35
  91. FOSTER
  92. 36
  93. REMI
  94. 37
  95. FOSTER
  96. 38
  97. FOSTER
  98. Before…
  99. 39
  100. FOSTER
  101. Now…
  102. 40
  103. REMI
  104. 41
  105. FOSTER
  106. 42
  107. REMI
  108. 43
  109. FOSTER
  110. 44
  111. REMI
  112. 45
  113. FOSTER
  114. 46
  115. REMI
  116. 47
  117. FOSTER
  118. EPILOGUE
  119. FOSTER
  120. Later…
  121. ALSO BY C.G. BLAINE
  122. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  123. ABOUT THE AUTHOR

I’m reviewing the latest footage from the crew when there’s a pounding at my door. But when I check the peephole, rather than a delivery, I see the back of a chick’s head. A long black ponytail over the hood of her winter coat, and her arms crossed.

Figuring she’s here for Xander—not the first time someone’s shown up when he doesn’t respond—I smother a groan and open the door to tell her he’s not here. And not interested since he clearly hasn’t talked to her recently.

“Can I help you?” I ask, already knowing the answer.

Except then she turns around, and the entire world folds in on itself.

“Oh my God, it’s really you.”

Sage rushes me, locking her arms around me. It would knock the air out of me if I had any, but it vanished the second I saw her face. I slip back into my body after a second, a quiet sob escaping as I embrace her back.

“How…?”

“Foster,” she chokes out, pulling back and grasping my face, tears falling. “Or Adams? That’s a mind-fuck on its own.”

I scan her over like I do Imane, seeking out every change. She’s the exact same yet wildly different, and I drag her back for another hug. We stand just inside the door for a long time, not talking while we cry.

When I finally pull away, I step around her to shut the door. “I can’t believe you’re here.”

She spins, her eyes shiny. “I’m here, and I’m so sorry, Remi. I was a selfish teen and incredibly naive, and I let you down. I’ve wished so many times I could go back and help you the way I should have.”

I shake my head, confused by her apology. “Did Foster tell you⁠—”

“Nothing,” she says. “He only told me you’d been on tour with him, and if you didn’t want to see me, I had to leave.”

“Don’t leave.” I tug open one of the buttons on her coat to emphasize, and one side of her mouth tips up.

She shucks off her coat, following me into the living room. I sit, she sits, and then she scoots closer.

“You weren’t okay back then,” she says. “Miles tried to tell me shit wasn’t okay for you so many times, but I couldn’t see it. I was oblivious to so much, and after you left, I still twisted it to be about me. I’d decided you two were together, so when Daniel told me you and Roman ran off together, I believed him. I said you guys were hanging out, feeling sorry for myself because I was the one left behind.”