Why lie? Why not just end it? Why cut me in the one way she knew would bleed me out?

Why not me?

I close my eyes, thinking the last one, knowing I can’t ask any of them. The questions threaten more than I can risk. It already aches to be around her. My armor’s scuffed and bent from the battle of having her on tour. Hearing any of those answers from Remi could be the sword that slips through my ribs.

Then everyone suffers.

Again.

Blowing out a breath, I spin around and find the cruelest mercy in the doorway. Remi hugs herself around the middle, standing barely inside the curtain like maybe she doesn’t want to be.

I don’t want her to be either, but I also don’t want her anywhere else. Two assholes struggle inside me, one needing to exist in misery for the other to have any chance at peace.

“What,” I say, not hiding the harshness in my tone. “You can’t do enough damage from out there?”

As I stalk down the aisle between the bunks, she swallows, but she holds her ground in her black-and-white striped mini skirt and tight black top. We set up for the same impasse as out there. Except we’re getting a different ending.

“I will move you, Remi.” The warning curls between us, and I don’t stop until I’m towering over her. She tilts her chin up to hold my stare. I’m beyond pissed I have to fight through the glint of sadness always lurking in hers.

Her breath picks up. Mine saws in and out.

She breaks the stalemate right before I follow through.

“You really think it wasn’t real between us?” She studies me when I don’t answer, and then her arms fall to her sides. She forces a lifeless attempt at a smile. “Right. I’m sorry I even asked.”

She backs into the curtain, and I clench my jaw, refusing the words. But when she moves to leave, I say them anyway.

“Was it real?”

She stops, casting her emerald eyes up to me. “Of course we were.”

The sad morphs to something more akin to heartbreak as she starts to turn, and I step, wrapping my hand around the front of her neck and tugging her back to me. My mouth crashes down on hers. The damage is instantaneous. Her warm lips against mine and the feel of her sharp intake of air are all it takes before I need more. I plunge my tongue into her mouth, demanding it.

Fuck if ruin doesn’t taste sweet.

Remi claws at my shirt, and I groan as I push her against the doorway.

“Foster,” she breathes, my lips skating across her jaw, and because it’s us, I answer, “Remi.”