RUFUS   It’s a case of all hands to the pumps. Now gather round, everybody.
They gather round Totty.
Prepare to lift … Lift!
They hoist her up and carry her out.

INT./EXT. GARDEN SET. NIGHT.

The camera starts with an overhead shot that makes it quite clear we are in a studio. George and Peter have used a builders’ ditch as a grave. They have a lantern.

The cortège arrives.

PAULINE   What do we do now?

RUFUS   Lower her in – get her on the tablecloth.
As Totty is lowered in, flashes illuminate the sky and there is a low rumble. A couple of distant explosions.

PAULINE   It’s like the war.

STELLA   If only it was.

BETTY   Poor old Totty – goodbye.
Various murmurs – ‘Goodbye, Totty’, ‘Farewell, old friend’, ‘Goodbye, Totty. Till we meet again,’ etc. Pauline weeps.

MR GREGORY   Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust, forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty God of His great mercy to take unto Himself the soul of our dear sister here departed, In sure and certain hope of Resurrection …
Mr Gregory throws a handful of earth on the body.

GEORGE   We’d better cover it up.

BETTY   There are some planks here. Help me, George.
As George and Betty start to lift a long plank, the guests begin to stir, look at watches, cough, etc.

RUFUS   We really ought to be going.

PAULINE   Yes. Rufus has to be up in the morning.

STELLA   Dickie has to be up in the morning too. Come along, Dickie.

BETTY   You’re not all going?

OSCAR   I think we ought to, out of respect.

BETTY   Respect?

PAULINE   She had such dignity.

RUFUS   It wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anybody’s fault.
Betty and George are left covering planks across the grave.

EXT. ENGLISH ROADS. DAY.

The van is lost in a maze of suburban streets, Brian giving Kevin directions off a map.

BRIAN   First left – next right – second right.

KEVIN   There used to be a cinema on that corner.

BRIAN   Three-quarters round the roundabout.
The van circles a roundabout and speeds off down a broad, straight road.

INT. HALL. NIGHT.

Betty and George return to the hall. It is empty. The front door is open.

BETTY   Have they all gone? Where is everyone?
Peter and Sue emerge from the cloakroom in their motor-cycle gear.

PETER   They went on. They wanted to stay together. They said goodbye.

SUE   We’d better say goodbye, too. Goodbye, we did enjoy it.

PETER   It was lovely seeing you all again.

GEORGE   Goodbye.

PETER   Goodbye.

BETTY   Goodbye.

SUE   Goodbye.

GEORGE   Goodbye – and take care.
As George goes to close the door, he hears a discreet cough. Mr Gregory and Mrs Brookstone have emerged from the music room. Mr Gregory has changed back into mufti.

MR GREGORY   We must go.

MRS BROOKSTONE   Yes, it’s very late.

BETTY   But what about us? …What about George and me?

MR GREGORY   (vaguely) Another time.
But he waits still.