Despite not being able to talk, he had confessed, grimly typing out a statement in front of Thomas. It was much the same as he’d told Jenny. He and Mel were walking along the path by the golf course and arguing. She tried to phone Fiona and tell her about their affair, about the baby. He panicked, strangled her in a fit of rage, then dragged her body deep into the bushes and ran.

Jenny thought about Craig’s suicide attempt. He was a murderer and a liar, and he had betrayed women over and over again. But he was also a father to Hannah and Sophia. And of course Mel’s baby, DNA tests confirmed it.

It was such a colossal mess. Jenny wondered if Fiona had been to see him in hospital. Jenny had toyed with the idea when she was released from her ward, to see him face to face, get answers, confront him. But there were no answers.

She’d had trouble sleeping since she got home, nightmares of stabbing and strangulation, violence and retribution. She dreamed of killing Craig and felt sick when she woke up sweating, stomach wound screaming in the dark.

‘Are you OK?’

It was Victor, eyes wet as he swallowed.

‘How are your parents holding up?’ Jenny said.

‘They’re not really, none of us are.’

‘It’s hard.’316

Vic looked round the room at his relatives. ‘But we’re glad we know the truth. We’re glad there’s justice.’

Was this justice? A young woman was dead, what could compensate for that? Jenny wondered if she wanted Craig to kill himself, but she couldn’t even work that out.

‘Have you seen Hannah?’ Victor said.

Jenny scanned the room but couldn’t see her. ‘I’ll go and find her.’

She suddenly needed distance from this and she was already stepping away, her stomach burning. She touched Vic on the shoulder and left him looking lost.

Indy was sitting at reception looking equally lost. Jenny sometimes forgot how hard all this must be for her too.

‘Is Hannah about?’

Indy pursed her lips and looked upstairs. ‘She needed a moment.’

The front door opened and Jenny turned. Liam stood in the doorway looking sheepish, but he smiled when he saw her.

‘Hi,’ he said.

‘Hi.’

‘I saw you on the news.’

‘I’m famous now.’

Liam looked into the chapel, saw everyone milling about. ‘This is a bad time.’

‘No,’ Jenny said. ‘We can talk through here.’

She led him to an empty viewing room and realised it was the same room she spoke to Orla in. When was that? Less than three weeks ago. Ripples and reverberations, echoes and feedback.

‘How are you?’ he said.

‘OK.’

She wondered how long people would keep asking how she was. At some point they would stop and she’d miss it. Because maybe then would be the time she really needed to talk about how she was.317