15

AMAYA

Day of the Poruwa Ceremony

I was so upset I couldn’t sleep. I paced around my room, trying to take deep breaths, but that hardly worked.

Sacrifice is important, Dr. Dunn had said. Sacrifice is one of the greatest things we could do to show someone that we love them. There is no purer gift.

I liked to remind myself of this. Of my sacrifice. How I had given up my best friend, how I had given up my only chance of love and family. How I gave up a literal part of myself. And for what? For Kaavi to marry the man who shattered my world? For it to all be in vain?

How was I supposed to calm down? How was I supposed to relax when everything that was important to me was about to be ruined forever.

I couldn’t make Kaavi understand.

So I had to do something else.

Seetha knocked on my door.

“Baba, shall I bring you a tea?”

“No, thank you, Seetha. Why are you up so late?”

Her eyes took in the mess in my room, my tearstained face and smudged makeup.

“Baba, it’s morning. Haven’t you gone to sleep yet?”

“I’m fine, Seetha. Don’t worry.”

“Baba, the van will be leaving to the hotel soon. Is it still okay for me to go?”

With everything that was going on, I had forgotten that Seetha was going to the wedding. Apparently, Mrs. Fonseka had asked her to help and she couldn’t say no. Why would she? She was probably happy to see Kaavi get married, like any normal person would be.

I checked my watch. 7:47 a.m. I guess it wouldn’t be a bad thing if she wasn’t around. Maybe today will be a better day.

As if on cue, my phone started to ring.

“Mahesh,” I said in way of greeting, turning my back on Seetha and hoping she’d take the hint. I heard my door shut softly but still took care to keep my voice down.

“Amaya Akki, can I come to your place now?”

Finally.

Plan C wasn’t my favorite plan, but deep in my heart of hearts I knew it would come to this. From the moment I saw the post on Instagram I knew—things had to finally come to an end. People didn’t just get to do whatever it was they wanted. There were repercussions for their actions. No matter how delayed.

I splashed some water on my face. My mascara had smudged into giant raccoon eyes, and it wouldn’t really wash off. My hair was in tangles. I pulled off my dress from last night and put on a T-shirt and jeans, but they were so rumpled from my suitcase that I looked like even more of a disaster. I didn’t care. There was only one thing on my mind now.

I thought about how I felt when I threw Kaavi’s wedding dress into the fire. How I finally felt powerful, how I finally felt in control after years. I got lucky with the dress. No one saw me and I doubt I’d get caught. What I was going to do next wouldn’t be the same. But it was a price I was willing to pay. I knew that from the moment I heard about the wedding. That I had to stop it. Even if it meant being locked up.