He smiled back. ‘You’re going to do great.’

‘Thank you. And thank you again for agreeing to come. I really do appreciate it. Things are a little less scary when you have backup, aren’t they?’

‘They can be, yes. And you’re welcome.’

The house was quiet again now that my family had left. Dinner had been a fun, slightly noisy affair, but I’d enjoyed it. I had found the day shopping with Poppy stressful at times, still unused to dealing with crowds and people in general, but I’d loved having the opportunity to be with my sister-in-law and sharing moments together, even just chatting in the coffee shop as we fuelled up in between bouts of looking for the perfect dress. This was something else I’d missed out on, I reflected. I’d spent all this time thinking I was helping myself, but cracks had begun to appear in that philosophy. I was still absolutely terrified about the premiere and certainly wasn’t about to turn into a social butterfly overnight, but I’d have Jack with me for the event. I still didn’t think I would have been able to do it alone. I did enjoy the walks on my own, the one I’d done, at least, but I felt so much happier and relaxed going with Clive. It felt like I had social backup if I needed it, and of course, company which was something I’d been sorely short of for much of the past decade.

21

Need help!

I messaged Poppy a couple of days later. The premiere was approaching faster than I’d have liked and, despite spending hours watching YouTube make-up tutorials – time I should have spent writing – I just couldn’t seem to end up with anything that looked remotely good enough for a situation this snazzy. Flicking through videos and images of other premieres showing guests with perfect hair, clothes and make-up, not to mention bodies, I began to work myself up into a state. Several times, my fingers hovered over the keyboard, preparing to send Zinnia an email saying I wouldn’t be attending after all. But somewhere, in the back of my mind, Jack’s words kept echoing. He was right. I had worked hard for this and not many writers got this sort of opportunity. There was no guarantee I’d ever sell the movie rights to any of my other books, just because this one had done well.

Some time ago, I’d been invited to a private screening of the film but, of course, I’d made excuses and declined. Now I wished I’d found some brave pants and gone. What if I got to the premiere and hated what they’d done with the book? Oh God, not only did I need help with make-up, I also needed immediate acting coaching too so that I didn’t put my foot in it. But, of course, I could absolutely love it. I stared at the mirror.

‘I will love it. It’s going to be wonderful,’ I said to myself. Clive shuffled a little closer to the chair. Reaching down, I gave his head a scratch. ‘That’s right, isn’t it, Clive? It’s all going to be fine.’ Maybe if I repeated it enough, I’d trick my brain into believing it. I looked back at the mirror. There was no tricking my brain or my eyes into the belief that I hadn’t made a pig’s ear of the evening/smoky eyed look that the tutorial promised me. This was the fourth time I’d tried, and my face was sore from the constant wiping off and starting again. I’d be out of make-up before I got it right at this rate. As for fake eyelashes, those had quite literally gone out of the window some time ago. I must remember to go and pick them up off the lawn before Clive decided to try to eat them. All the videos made it look so easy but now I knew the truth. They lie!