‘I understand that,’ she says, and another pause settles over us. Did you miss me too? I want to ask, like a needy kid.

‘Is she there now?’ Cathy asks brightly. ‘I’d love to say hi—’

‘Who, Izzy? Um, no, she’s at school—’

‘Oh, of course she is. How silly of me. The holidays whiz by so quickly, don’t they?’

‘Yes, they really do!’ It’s clear now that this is how we have managed our conversations, since the split: muddling through the preliminaries before I’ve passed the phone to Izzy and everyone can relax. Whatever possessed me to call her from my work canteen?

‘Thanks for the beautiful bracelet,’ Cathy adds, which feels like another thud to the gut.

‘The bracelet?’

‘Oh.’ I can sense her frowning. ‘It’s just, the turquoise colours are so you, I assumed you chose it.’ What, like five months ago, when Andy and I were still together? Or does she think he keeps me on a retainer to take care of the choosing of gifts?

‘No, I’m sorry, Andy must have picked it.’

‘Right, well, it was lovely anyway,’ Cathy blusters, sounding relieved when I explain that I’m at work, and I really must go now.

Andy must have got it together to visit a jewellery counter, I decide, as I head back to my own floor. Or maybe Estelle buys Cathy’s presents now, and visits his parents to be festooned with cinnamon buns?

Chapter Sixteen

Tuesday, August 13

‘When are we starting your life coaching?’ Jules asks, as we meet while picking up our girls from after-school club.

I look at my friend, always perky and fresh, brimming with energy. I’m still feeling pretty crap after talking to my mum-in-law yesterday, and can’t seem to be able to shake it off. ‘Are you sure you want to take me on?’ I ask.

‘Yes, of course I do!’ She glances at me as we leave school together. ‘It’s normal to feel a bit apprehensive before your first session but I promise you, it’ll be great …’ She smiles encouragingly. ‘There’s so much you can do, Viv. How about we get started this Saturday? Just be open-minded and ready to chat. Is eleven any good for you?’

I pause and consider this. Izzy will probably be out with Andy, I figure. And if he has alternative plans, he can change them and fit around me for once. ‘Okay,’ I say hesitantly. ‘Do I need to prepare, or do anything—’

‘You just need to be there,’ she says, flashing another wide smile, and by the time Izzy and I arrive home I’ve begun to feel grateful to Jules for being so insistent. Although I’ve certainly been coping better generally, I’m still prone to bouts of self-pity and emotional outbursts over the most ridiculous things.